A friend sent me an article today written by a female who is a member of the APA division 51 which is the division dedicated to studying men and masculinity. The article was about lowering men’s suicide rates by getting them to take more time in caring for the children. What?! Guess where the article was published? MS Magazine!
So the first thing to note is that the MS crowd has always pushed for men to do more care for the children. Take care of the kids. Yes, we have heard that rally cry for many years, right? So now a researcher comes along and ties in that feminist dream with the idea that if only men would do more to take care of the kids it would keep them from committing suicide! Voila! We get what we always wanted and can frame it in terms of “helping.” What a plan.
But wait a minute. There are a couple of things wrong with this research idea. Well, more than a couple of things. Here’s a start.
It is a fact that today’s men are spending more time in taking care of the children than ever, right? If men are indeed spending more time caring for the children this theory would postulate that their suicides would be in decline, right? But has the ratio of 4-1 males to females committing suicide changed over the last century and into this one? Nope.
Okay, that is one strike.
The research started by saying that countries like China and Pakistan, where women outnumber (or are close to outnumbering) men in suicides are not outliers but show that the male to female 4-1 ratio is not universal. Good point. But why then did they not include China or Pakistan in their research? Those countries would show that married women, who do most of the caring for children are very likely to kill themselves. Sorta blows the whole theory, right?
Then they would have to explain why White men outnumber Black men in suicides since the White guys are more likely to be involved in child care? Right?
And then they would need to show why 5 times as many adolescent boys kill themselves compared to girls? It obviously has nothing to do with the boys caring for children. Something way beyond that variable.
But there is another little problem. Why are men over the age of 65 at the greatest risk of suicide? Is that because they didn’t care more for their kids when they were in their 30’s?
The reality about male suicide which no one will address is the empathy gap. The reasons for male suicide are many and it could be that caring for children might be one of the many. But the one factor that is obvious to anyone who has swallowed even a part of a red pill is the empathy gap. Basically, no one gives a shit about a man’s emotional pain. Let women experience for even a short period what it would be like if no one attended to her emotional pain. She can’t imagine what it would be like since she has never experienced such a thing. She watched as her brothers were told “Big Boys Don’t Cry” and continued to make use of her advantage to get what she wanted while her brother looked on. He never had that and has a hard time imagining what it would be like.
I see this article and this research as an easy way to skate away from personal responsibility for the empathy gap. Every therapist should be singing this to the masses, that men get less compassion simply due to their being men. Every therapist should be looking at their own part in offering men less empathy and making changes. Every therapist should be helping people understand that men need admiration and respect to feel whole. I am picking on therapists here because they should be the frontline in alerting the culture and teaching others about psychological issues. But we don’t see that. What we see are feminists thinking men should care more for the kids.