MenAreGood
Understanding Men
Testosterone, It Starts Early
January 03, 2024
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Understanding Men is a series of articles and videos that progressively explain the many natural factors that help us see men in a realistic light.  Today's world is filled with negative spin on men and masculinity and this has done great harm to men and boys.  That harm is amplified by the media and the educational systems ignoring an abundance of research knowledge that reveals what is driving healthy masculinity and healthy manhood.  This series digs into that research and clinical observations and offers it for your consideration. Understanding Men will be open to all subscribers and will not require a paid subscription.  If you would like to support my work that would be great but not a necessity.  Look for it each Wednesday. Men are good!

 We start with Testosterone.

In order to understand men and boys you must understand testosterone. This section will give you a good start in beginning to appreciate the importance of testosterone to boys and men.  It starts before you were born. This is an excerpt from my book for mothers about their boys.

It Starts Early

The differences between boys and girls start very early. In fact they start the first day of life. Research has shown that infant boys are more likely to attend to an object or a mobile while infant girls are more likely to attend to a human face.1 But why this difference so shortly after birth? With no socialization to influence boys or girls at day one how is it that there might be differences? This is where we need to back up about 6 or 7 months.

THE TESTOSTERONE FLOOD


At approximately 8-24 weeks in utero most boys receive what is called a testosterone flood. This sudden increase in testosterone has multiple consequences. One consequence is that these raised levels of testosterone change the brain of the baby. The default brain is the female brain or what researcher Simon Baron-Cohen calls the “relational” or “empathic” brain.2 This relational brain is built to focus more on empathy, nurturing and relationships. Without the testosterone flood we would all have this relational brain, but with the flood, the brain starts to develop into what researchers call the male brain or what Baron-Cohen calls the “systemizing brain.” This male brain has a different set of strengths. It prefers to focus on systems: what makes them tick, what removing one piece might do to the whole, what a simple change in one part might do to another, the joy of building it piece by piece or taking it apart. Think Legos. Can you remember little boys spending hours upon hours with Legos? I bet you can. I would also bet that you might remember a similarly aged little girl that loved Legos in about the same way. And here is where things get interesting. It turns out that a small percentage of females also get an increase in testosterone in utero and develop what researchers call male brains.3 The girls who get this testosterone tend to be much less interested in traditionally feminine sorts of things, they would rather play rough and climb trees and spend hours with Legos. They tend to feel more happy being with the boys and they will often reject ostensibly female things. What we know now is that these young ladies are unique as girls at least in part because they got this extra testosterone and it is this pre-natal testosterone that is playing a part. I’m sure you have known some of these girls before; we call them “Tom Boys.”

It’s important to note that there is also a small percentage of boys who do not get this testosterone flood and therefore have a more “female” brain. These are the boys that are easier for moms to understand. They are more like mom and their way of being in the world is more like mom is used to. If you have a son like this (and if you have a “female brain”) you may be close due to your similarity. This is the young man that makes the mom wonder why her other sons can’t be like that.

Researchers have been able to identify those boys and girls who experienced this extra testosterone and they have studied these boy’s and girl’s behaviors and personalities as they have gotten older. What they have found is that those with greater testosterone levels in utero are more likely to want to play with “boy” toys like trucks and things that move. They are more likely to be more active, aggressive and competitive, less interested in traditionally feminine things and less interested in infants and nurturing behaviors.4,5 Those with lower levels of testosterone are more likely to have more interest in dolls and playing house, to be more interested in nurturing and in sharing secrets and personal data, and to prefer to play with a single friend or two, rather than with a larger group. Of course parents have been seeing these differences for a long time but likely assumed these differences were based solely on socialization, not on biology. Now we know differently. There are many factors that impact our differences.

A good deal of research is being done on the testosterone flood and how it influences children. As of 2020, scientists are confident about four connected differences from this flood. These are the boy-typical play behaviors, the increased chance of early aggressive behavior, influence on the core sexual identity and an impact on sexual orientation.6 There are other differences that are being studied but the strength of connection has yet to be proven for these.

What does this tell us? It suggests that your son, if he had the testosterone flood, will probably like to play in a way that most boys like to play, he may be interested in masculine play and be turned off by feminine activity. He will likely be attracted to females when he matures and he may be aggressive at times.

Our personalities are impacted by our biology even before we are born. This goes against common knowledge that our socialization is the only determinant to our ways of being. This is false. Our prenatal testosterone is just one biological factor and it impacts us in a profound manner. This testosterone flood has what biologists call “organizational” qualities. That is, the testosterone organizes the brain in certain patterns, literally changing the brain’s structure.7 These patterns make up what is being called the male brain. In addition to testosterone’s organizational qualities it also sensitizes receptor cells in the brain to be more reactive so that later in life the bodies of the boys and girls who received this flood will be more reactive to testosterone. This is called testosterone priming. Lastly, testosterone has what scientists call activational qualities. These are more transient and non- permanent effects on an already developed nervous system. This is what most of us think of when we think of hormones and the way they work. We get a squirt of this or that hormone and our bodies react accordingly.

Prenatal testosterone is not the only time when there is a surge in testosterone within boys’ bodies. A second surge of testosterone happens shortly after baby boys are born. Some scientists are calling this the “Mini Puberty.”8 This surge lasts between the first to third month of life (and sometimes longer) and is being studied now to get a sense of what impact it might have on these young boys. This surge is considerably easier to study since direct measurements of the testosterone can be made on a regular basis and do not depend on the blood levels of the pregnant mother or the testosterone levels in the amniotic fluid.

And, of course, there is the flood of testosterone that we are all familiar with, when boys reach puberty and once again their bodies are flooded with testosterone, about ten times the levels of testosterone that their sisters experience.

SYSTEMIZING

Let's take just a minute to examine what is meant by the systemizing brain that seems to result from the testosterone flood. This systemizing brain prefers to focus on systems. But when we say systems, what do we mean? These systems might be about anything with an input and an output. An example might be a machine like a car. It has numerous driver “inputs” like steering, braking, and accelerating. Change one of the inputs and the system changes. Learning how these inputs change the outputs is learning the system. A mainframe computer would be a more complex example. Or take a simpler example like Legos, there are a multitude of ways to attach the pieces, different colors, and different shapes. Learning the system is learning how to manipulate the inputs to get the output you might want. Another system might be swinging a baseball bat. The swing itself is a system. Learning the different parts of the swing, learning how to adjust that swing, and various different ‘inputs” the ball player could use to get the desired outputs is a system. Systems can even be as simple as a phonebook where names and numbers are connected or as complex as a philosophy. Our worlds are filled with systems.

WHAT WE TALK ABOUT

An easy way to get a sense of this difference in the systemizing brain and the empathic brain is to think for a moment about the topics of conversations of your sons and of your daughters. What sorts of things do your sons like to talk about? I would bet that they talk about systems or competing, and sometimes both. Talking about video games is talking about systems: input and output and which inputs bring success. Boys can talk about video games for hours. What was done, what worked, what didn’t, and all the gory details of the experience. (Of course they would prefer to play them and not talk.) I am willing to bet you have heard these conversations before. Discussing sports is another system: who is winning, what Team A needs to do to be more competitive against Team B, and on and on. The other piece is that in both these topics there is a likelihood that the discussion centered around competition. Who is first? Second? Last? Who is a level up and who is five levels behind? And this of course is a part of the system.

Now contrast this with the typical discussion you might hear with girls. Sure the girls might talk about sports or video games but it seems more likely they will talk about relationships. Who is their best friend, what are they doing together? Who will or won’t play with whom? Disclosing this or that personal data. Hearing about others’ relationships. This is what you are more likely to hear from your girls. Some girls, however, will love to talk about sports and some boys will be more interested in relationships. What we are talking about is not a predictor of behavior but is a way of observing it. You can’t say, “Because he is a boy, he will do this or that.” But you can simply observe how your child may or may not fit in with the differences we are describing and build a deeper understanding of their uniqueness. Once we observe we can see how this plays out in the lives of our children.

Excerpt from Helping Mothers Be Closer to Their Sons: Understanding the World of Boys pg 3-8

 

References

1. Connellan, Jennifer, Simon Baron-Cohen, Sally Wheelwright, Anna Batki, and Jag Ahluwalia. "Sex Differences in Human Neonatal Social Perception." Infant Behavior and Development 23.1 (2000): 113-18. Web.

2. Baron-Cohen, Simon. The Essential Difference: The Truth about the Male and Female Brain. New York: Basic, 2003. Print.

3. Ibid.

4. Hines, Melissa, Michaela Constantinescu, and Debra Spencer. "Early Androgen Exposure and Human Gender Development." Biology of Sex Differences 6.1 (2015): n. pag. Web.

5. Eaton, Warren O., and Lesley R. Enns. "Sex Differences in Human Motor Activity Level." Psychological Bulletin 100.1 (1986): 19-28. Web.

6. Ibid.

7. Arnold, A. "Organizational and Activational Effects of Sex Steroids on Brain and Behavior: A Reanalysis." Hormones and Behavior 19.4 (1985): 469-98. Web.

8. Alexander, Gerianne M. "Postnatal Testosterone Concentrations and Male Social Development." Frontiers in Endocrinology 5 (2014): n. pag. Web.

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September 17, 2026
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When One Incel Becomes Ten
How one real threat became evidence of a widespread violent ideology among French youth

 

 

 


One of the great dangers of modern journalism is that a false narrative can acquire the appearance of fact simply by attaching itself to an authoritative source. That is what appears to have happened in a recent Le Monde article about “masculinism.”

The article makes a series of extraordinary claims about boys and men. Its very title announces that masculinism is an “increasingly widespread, violent and popular ideology among French youth.” Throughout the article, male grievance, separated fathers, antifeminism, the manosphere, incels, misogyny and terrorism are placed close enough together that they begin to look like parts of the same phenomenon.

 


And the claims carry considerable authority because they are presented as flowing from a 260-page French Senate report drawing, in part, on information from the DGSI—France’s domestic security service. That sounds impressive. But then you read what the underlying material actually says. And the story begins to fall apart.

The security evidence is dramatically narrower than the Le Monde narrative built around it. Instead of evidence that a widespread movement of French boys and young men is becoming violent, we find one exceptionally serious case involving a young man identified with incel and Black Pill ideology who was allegedly preparing an attack, along with approximately nine other young people being monitored because authorities considered them susceptible to violent radicalization in connection with the incel milieu.

Those are not the same thing. One boy was allegedly preparing an attack. The others were considered susceptible to radicalization.

Yet watch what happens as this information moves through the story:

One alleged incel attack plot → roughly ten monitored youths → incels → the manosphere → masculinism → a widespread violent ideology among French youth.

At every step the population gets larger. But the word violent travels with it.

That is what makes this more than sloppy wording. When journalism takes evidence about one exceptional case and allows its most frightening characteristics to spread across larger and larger groups, it can create a public narrative that the underlying evidence never established.

And when the people being described are boys and men, the resulting narrative can become deeply misandrist: ordinary male distress starts looking suspicious; male grievance becomes a possible gateway to extremism; fathers’ advocacy can be placed alongside misogyny; and boys searching for help, identity or belonging can appear as the outer edge of a terrorist problem.

So I decided to look more closely at the young men being used to support this narrative. That is when I discovered something remarkable.


One incel had become ten.

Not literally, of course. The other young people did not suddenly adopt his beliefs or actions. Rather, the characteristics of this one serious case began to migrate outward onto other young people for whom the evidence was very different.

The DGSI, France’s domestic security service, reported approximately ten young people under scrutiny because they were considered susceptible to violent radicalization in connection with the incel milieu. That is not the same thing as saying that ten violent incels had been discovered.

One young man was identified with incel/Black Pill ideology and allegedly preparing an attack. The others were being watched because authorities believed they might be susceptible to radicalization. That distinction is crucial.

Susceptibility is not radicalization. Surveillance is not violence. And being considered vulnerable to recruitment into an ideology is certainly not the same thing as personally identifying with that ideology.

At each step the population expands while the frightening characteristic derived from the smallest and most extreme group remains attached. That is the sleight of hand at the heart of this story.


The part of the story we weren’t told

There is another detail that makes the Saint-Étienne case considerably more complicated than the framing suggests. According to the account attributed to the DGSI, the young man’s hostility was directed toward a particular girl whom he believed had falsely accused his friends of rape.

That does not make the alleged plot less serious. Nor does it demonstrate that incel ideology played no role. Both things could have been operating simultaneously. But surely it matters when we are trying to understand motive.

There is a significant difference between a young man wanting to attack women simply because they are women and a young man who embraces incel ideas but is also enraged at a particular person because he believes she seriously harmed his friends. The Le Monde article made no mention of his concerns for his friends.

Perhaps incel ideology intensified that grievance. Perhaps the grievance drove his attraction to the ideology. Perhaps both were important. We don’t know. And that is precisely the point.

The available evidence does not allow us simply to choose among those possibilities. But remove the specific grievance and what remains is a much cleaner story:

Incel hates women and plans attack against girl.

Put the omitted grievance back in and the story becomes more complicated:

A troubled young man immersed in incel/Black Pill material allegedly planned violence against a particular girl whom he believed had falsely accused his friends of rape.

The second description is less convenient. It is also more complete.


One boy carries the weight of the story

This matters because the Saint-Étienne suspect is doing an enormous amount of work in the larger narrative. He is the strongest evidence of the progression the article wants the reader to see:

male grievance → incel ideology → radicalization → violence

But then his characteristics begin to bleed outward onto the other young people.

The Senate report itself is more cautious. It distinguishes cognitive radicalization from behavioral radicalization and acknowledges that the scientific literature does not establish a causal relationship between exposure to masculinist material and violent action. Ideological adherence, it says, does not mechanically lead to violence.

That qualification changes everything. A boy can watch objectionable material without accepting it. He can accept radical ideas without becoming violent. He can be lonely or angry without being radicalized. He can be susceptible to radicalization without actually becoming radicalized. And he can be monitored by a security service without ever having planned an attack.

Those aren’t minor semantic distinctions. They are different evidentiary categories.


How a threat grows on paper

Once you preserve those distinctions, the architecture of the story becomes much easier to see. There are really three very different populations.

The first is a serious case: a young man identified with incel/Black Pill ideology who was allegedly preparing an attack.

The second is a tiny security population: approximately ten young people considered susceptible to violent radicalization in connection with incel milieus.

The third is an enormous and heterogeneous population of boys and men who may watch male-oriented influencers, participate in parts of the manosphere, criticize feminism, favor traditional sex roles, belong to fathers’ groups, struggle with dating, or simply search online for help with loneliness, fitness, money, relationships, or becoming a better man.

Evidence about the first population does not automatically describe the second. And evidence about the second certainly does not describe the third.

But place all three populations close enough together and the reader begins to experience them as points along a single continuum. That is where framing becomes so powerful.

You don’t actually have to say that the lonely fifteen-year-old watching fitness videos is on his way to becoming a terrorist. You merely put him into a narrative that begins with algorithms and male grievance, passes through misogyny and incels, and ends with terrorism.

The reader supplies the arrow.


One attack becomes two

This is also why another discrepancy in the Le Monde article matters so much. The article says that two violent masculinist actions were foiled in 2024 and 2025. But the underlying Senate report identifies one imminent incel terrorist attack foiled by the DGSI—the Saint-Étienne case.

The report discusses other young people who were arrested, referred, investigated, or monitored. But those categories are not interchangeable.

A referral is not an attack. Surveillance is not an attack. Concern about possible radicalization is not an attack. Preparation for an attack is something else entirely.

Unless a second equivalent case can be identified, turning one foiled attack into two “violent actions” isn’t merely a numerical discrepancy. It reinforces the larger narrative by making an extraordinarily small phenomenon appear to be reproducing itself.

And the report itself warns against drawing broad conclusions from these cases. The number is simply too small.

Yet the headline offered to readers was:

“Masculinism, an increasingly widespread, violent and popular ideology among French youth.”

Think about the distance between that headline and the underlying security evidence. One alleged imminent attack. Approximately ten young people being watched because they were considered susceptible to violent radicalization associated with the incel milieu. Only one clearly identified here as an incel/Black Pill adherent preparing an attack.

That is a very different story.


The boys disappear again

There is one final part of this that troubles me. The Senate material describes many of these young people as profoundly vulnerable. Their histories include bullying, social isolation, trauma, sexual victimization, disability, psychiatric difficulties, and dysfunctional families.

Those details should matter. They don’t excuse threats or violence. A young man preparing to hurt someone needs to be stopped regardless of what happened to him.

But imagine encountering a group of troubled girls with those histories. Would our first question be: How dangerous are these girls to men? Or would we ask: What happened to them?

With these boys, their vulnerability seems to become interesting primarily because it may make them susceptible to radicalization. Their suffering becomes a security indicator.

The boy disappears and the potential perpetrator takes his place.

That may be one of the most revealing aspects of the entire story.

The same information could have prompted another set of questions. Why are these boys isolated? Why were some of them bullied? What happened to the sexually victimized ones? Where are their fathers? Where are the male mentors? Why are boys searching online for communities that seem to offer them belonging, identity and meaning? And what could we do to reach them before some negative influencers do?

Those questions don’t require ignoring genuine threats. Quite the opposite. Understanding troubled boys more accurately might be one of the best ways of preventing the tiny number who actually become dangerous from getting there.


A real threat needs no exaggeration

There really was a serious case in Saint-Étienne. French authorities appear to have identified a credible threat and intervened before anyone was hurt.

Good.

That is exactly what security services are supposed to do. And that story needs no exaggeration.

What it does not justify is allowing the characteristics of that one young man to migrate outward—to approximately nine other monitored youths, then to incels generally, then to the manosphere, then to “masculinism,” and ultimately to a broad population of boys and men whose beliefs and behavior bear little resemblance to his.

There is a lesson here that reaches far beyond this particular article. Whenever we hear that some enormous group is becoming “radicalized,” “extremist” or “violent,” we should ask a few simple questions:

How many people actually committed violence? How many actually planned violence? How many were merely being monitored? How many personally identified with the ideology being discussed? And at what point did evidence about a tiny extreme subgroup begin to describe everybody else?

Those questions are especially important when we are talking about boys.

A real threat should lead us to greater precision, not less. One alleged terrorist plot is serious enough.

We shouldn’t need to turn one incel into ten—and ten into a generation.

Men Are Good.

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September 14, 2026
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Feminist Buzzwords as Attack Drones
These words do more than describe. They arrive with the verdict already loaded.



 


During a recent video, I described feminist buzzwords as being something like attack drones. The more I think about it, the more I like the comparison.

An attack drone does not arrive to look around and figure out what happened. It has already been programmed. It knows what the target looks like. It knows who the enemy is before it ever gets there.

A lot of feminist buzzwords work the same way. They don’t just describe something that happened. They arrive with a theory already attached to them. Who has the power? Who is the victim? Who should be believed? Who needs to change? Usually the answer is already built in.

The man has power. His power is suspect. The woman lacks power. She is harmed by what he has done. So the word is doing quite a bit more than simply describing behavior. The verdict is built into the word. Every feminist buzzword arrives preloaded with ideology—and armed with disdain for men and masculinity.

 

Take mansplaining. Certainly a few men may explain things in an arrogant or condescending way. Women do too. We already had perfectly good words for that sort of behavior: patronizing, condescending, arrogant, rude. But mansplaining adds something. Now the man’s sex is part of the offense.

The word suggests that he is acting this way because he considers himself superior and makes the assumption that being male makes him more knowledgeable or more important. But do we know that? Did she misunderstand what he was trying to say? Does he talk this way to everyone? Was he simply trying to help? Before we have looked at any of that, the drone has already found its target. The behavior has been gendered. The motive has been supplied. The verdict is in. The buzzword arrived preloaded with ideology—and armed with disdain for men and masculinity.

 

Now take toxic masculinity. Some men behave badly. A small minority may be violent or reckless. But once those behaviors are placed under the heading of toxic masculinity, something else happens. Masculinity itself gets ​blamed and dragged into the mud.

The term suggests that these behaviors are an integrated part of masculinity and that men need to learn a different relationship to their own nature. Such a global generalization ignores all the demands placed on men. Provide. Protect. Compete. Take risks. Endure pain. Stay useful under pressure. Those parts of masculinity are usually welcomed when other people benefit from them.

A man works sixty hours a week to support his family? Good. He walks into danger to protect someone? Good. He pushes through pain because other people depend on him? Good. But when some men buckle under those same demands, the whole of masculinity can suddenly become toxic. Why? That is what the term does: it not only describes harmful behavior but directs us to blame masculinity itself—while diverting attention from the pressures, circumstances, and unmet needs that may have helped produce the behavior.

 

Male privilege carries a similar load. It trains us to notice the man’s advantages and ignore his disadvantages. We see the male CEO. We don’t see the male roofer, the foot soldier, the prisoner, the homeless man, the suicide victim, or the father who has lost his children.

A man’s success can be explained partly by privilege. His suffering is much more likely to be explained by his choices. Notice the difference? His suffering is his fault, while his success is due to his privilege. When judging men as a group, the term directs our attention upward, toward the men with the most wealth, status, and power. When judging women, it directs our attention downward, toward those facing the greatest hardship. Struggling men and successful women quietly disappear from the picture. And this can happen even when the particular woman standing in front of us has more education, more money, more institutional support, and more social credibility than the particular man. The theory can still tell us he has the power and she does not. At that point, the theory has become more important than the people standing right in front of us. The buzzword male privilege arrived preloaded with ideology—and armed with disdain for men and masculinity.

 

Fragile masculinity is a clever drone. Why? Because disagreement itself can become proof. Suppose a man objects to being mocked or stereotyped. His objection can be taken as evidence that his masculinity is fragile. What if he stays silent? Then there is no challenge. What if he speaks up? Now he has proved the accusation. Heads she wins. Tails he loses. The term doesn’t invite a response. It shuts ​it down.

 

Then we have the manosphere. Taken literally, this could simply mean internet spaces where men talk about men’s lives. That could include fathers’ groups, divorce forums, men’s health advocates, suicide-prevention groups, dating discussions, and critics of feminism. Pretty broad group, right? But that is rarely how the word is presented. Instead it is usually surrounded by other words: Misogyny. Radicalization. Extremism. Violence. Suddenly a father trying to understand a custody battle and a violent man threatening women can be placed in the same ominous container. Once the label has been attached, even ordinary concern for men can begin to look suspicious. The underlying message is that men don’t deserve compassion.

But there is something odd here. Where is the equivalent word for the huge network of universities, feminist organizations, advocacy groups, foundations, government agencies, media outlets, legal organizations, and research centers that create and circulate feminist ideas? That network is far larger and far more influential. Yet it mostly goes unnamed. And because it goes unnamed, it stays largely invisible. I call it the femosphere. Once you name it, you start to see it.

Feminist ideas do not simply appear out of nowhere. They are researched. Funded. Taught. Repeated. Promoted. Written into policy. And sometimes written into law.

 


Other terms do the same thing even more clearly. Take coercive control. There is certainly such a thing as a terrible pattern of domination and control inside a relationship. But what happens when the idea is interpreted almost entirely through a feminist power model? Then we can end up with the familiar story. Powerful man. Powerless woman. His controlling behavior becomes part of a larger system of male domination. Her controlling behavior may be minimized, ignored, or explained as self-protection. Same behavior? Different moral story.

Something similar happens with vicarious violence. The term has been used for situations in which a man harms children or other people in order to hurt a woman. That is terrible behavior and certainly deserves attention. But in countries such as Spain, the concept has even been incorporated into the legal framework as a form of male violence against women—building the sex of the perpetrator and victim into the official meaning. The law only goes one way. There is nothing in the law about a mother victimizing her children to hurt the man. Nothing. This even though we know that mothers murder their children as much or more than fathers. The vicarious violence law arrives preloaded with ideology—and armed with disdain for men and masculinity.

 


Then there is gender-based violence. Violence against a woman is often described as gender-based even when we do not actually know that her sex was the reason she was attacked. But violence against a man is far less likely to receive the same label. This is interesting because men are the majority of homicide victims and men are often expected to absorb danger precisely because they are men. But somehow that doesn’t fit quite as easily. Once again, men get agency and women get victimhood. Men do things. Things happen to women.


From description to control


This is why I think these words eventually become a form of social control. Not that every person using them is consciously trying to control men. Most aren’t.​ Most are unaware of what motivates them and simply repeat the arguments they have been taught—arguments that reinforce the narrative they have already swallowed. People ​tend to repeat the language they hear from professors, journalists, therapists, advocates, friends, and social media. The assumptions just travel along inside the word. Quietly. But the effect is still there.

These words help define what a man is allowed to say. How he is allowed to behave. How much authority he should have. How he is permitted to understand his own experience. And what happens if he objects? He may be told he is fragile. Toxic. Privileged. Misogynistic. Part of the manosphere. Do you see the problem? Every defense can become an opportunity to launch the next drone.

The ​drones can turn: male confidence into dominance; male disagreement into misogyny; male boundaries into control; male suffering into fragility; male spaces into radicalization; male success into privilege; and female aggression into a response to male power. Notice anything? The direction rarely changes. Men need correction. Women need protection. Men should give up power. Women should be given more. Men’s motives are questioned. Women’s experiences are affirmed.


The great paradox


And here is the strange part. This language keeps telling us that women are powerless while giving enormous power to women and to the institutions claiming to act on their behalf. The person labeled the victim receives moral authority. She is more likely to be believed. Protected. Excused. The person labeled powerful receives moral suspicion. He is expected to listen. Confess. Step back. Change. So powerlessness itself can become a kind of power.

Once victimhood carries enough moral authority, it can end arguments, destroy reputations, influence law, redirect public money, and place an entire sex under suspicion. And because all of this is being done in the name of helping the powerless, it becomes very difficult to question. ​”How dare you question giving help to the underdog!” That may be one of the most important things these buzzwords do. They hide power while using it.


Look inside the payload


Now, words are never completely neutral. And sometimes a new word really does help us see something we had missed. Nothing wrong with that. But shouldn’t we get a little suspicious when dozens of new terms all seem to tell us the same moral story? Men have power. Women do not. Men abuse. Women are harmed. Men need limits. Women need authority.

At some point, we have to ask whether we are describing reality or simply applying the same theory over and over again. When the conclusion comes before the evidence, we are no longer dealing with simple description. We are dealing with buzzwords arriving preloaded with ideology—and armed with disdain for men and masculinity.

So the next time one of these words appears, maybe stop for a minute. Ask if the word is being used as a weapon. Ask if it carries an underlying disdain for men. Ask if they have any compassion for men and boys. That one will stop them in their tracks and you will see them fumble for words that show how much compassion they have for men and boys. You have just neutralized an attack drone.

Well done.

Men are good.

 
 
 
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September 07, 2026
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all is as it is

This post is a story by Moiret Allegiere about about awakening to manhood.

 


The boy, sweating, stood silent halfway up the hill. Above, in the blue skies, the sun shone brightly. Warm. Late spring. A slight breeze – quite welcome, thought the boy – broke the stillness of the air.

The boy looked out upon the seemingly endless fields below. Ancient fields, a small portion of which were his and his was also the grass which he had just cut by the sweat of his brow and his scythe and nothing more.

The boy wiped the sweat from his eyes with the palm of his left hand. His right hand, the dominant one, hung limply to the side of his body, swaying. His muscles ached. He thought it more than he felt it. Years of toil had learned him to expect as much. The grass cut then was not his grass, yet the work and the toil and the sweat and the blood belonged to him and him alone. And the very same work and toil and sweat and blood had taught him that his right arm, when not in use, must be loose and limp and tender. As if not to spoil the meat or blood or strength within, but tenderize it, preserve it and conserve it.

Because harder times had been before and harder times would come once more. All things must be conserved and saved so as not to face that snarling beast again, having spoilt or spent knife and rifle both.

“The great divide”, thought the boy. 70/30, with the harder times bearing the brunt of the thing thus split. A beast of burden led with a thin string of silver across a rickety bridge. The boy knew this. The father of the boy taught him this. The boy was five and was watching his father cut the grass and dry it and turn it into food for the sheep. The man always saved some.

Rather would he see his sheep 30 percent starved than for them not to eat at all. So he said. He never strayed. His sheep were always well fed, and his children and his wife as well. The man never strayed. A few of his children had strayed already, yet they strayed only from his path onto their own path as had he when once he grew from boy to man. All was as it should be.

The boy stood there still, and he looked at his fields and then towards the lush green of the plants growing there which he himself placed there for food, and then towards his house which he had built upon the plot of land his father gave to him. A house in which a woman and a baby also lived and breathed and ate and slept.

The boy sighed.

He looked at his watch. The time was where it should be. He stood and he looked some more. He looked at his father’s house.

Still well-kept and maintained and nurtured and loved from seed to harvest.

Beside him now, and quite suddenly, his father stood. Quiet, perhaps, as is his wont, yet lively still, far from dead, merely crippled by arthritis and now incapable of tending to all that which he once tended to.

The boy gave the man a nod, and he smiled. The father stood and he looked. Then he smiled. And they looked both upon the son’s work and the son’s world, neither saying a word because no words were needed. Some time passed. Still was the air and the time was where it should be still. The man gestured with his arm.

“Sit down, son,” he said.

The boy sat down. His father stood there, smiling.

“How’s the baby?” He asked. He had always been a kind man, yet never before as kind as just now.

The boy thought.

“Growing, crying and shitting.”

The older of the two grinned and then he laughed, heartily, and his mood changed abruptly, as if suddenly remembering something long forgotten. He paused and turned to the boy. He looked at his son’s face. Still young and handsome and maintained and nurtured and loved from seed to harvest. And in his son’s face he saw at once his own face as once it was in younger years.

“All is as it should be then?”

“Yes,” the boy said.

“Yes,” said the man.

The older of the two went quiet for a bit, fumbling in his backpack which he always carried with him. The fumbling went on for a little longer than it should, thought both boy and man. The man found what he was looking for. The man was always prepared and the man never strayed, not now and not ever.

He pulled out a beer, and then he pulled out another. Piss-warm now, perhaps, yet it was still beer and still the time was right where it should be.

The son sighed and he smiled as his father opened a beer and handed it to him, saying nothing. There they were. The boy sitting and the man standing. They stood and sat and they looked at what was theirs and theirs alone, and they drank from their beers. Then looked and drank some more. Some time passed just as time does and they stood and sat as if all that was there or anywhere was them and them alone. The older of the two then put his hand upon the shoulder of the younger, and, smiling warmly, he nodded as if to say goodbye even when his lips and his mouth and his mind and his reason said “See you later, son”. He turned and walked away, going home.

The boy sat and he looked some more upon all that was there that was his and his alone. And he sighed and he smiled and he laughed and then he made to leave.

The man got to his feet and the man turned and walked away, going back home following behind the older man, too far behind to catch up yet close enough to never stray.

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