MenAreGood
Maryland Commission for Men's Health Report on Domestic Violence (2010)
July 23, 2024

I wrote this report when I was the vice-chair of the Maryland Commission for Men’s Health in 2008-2010. This was one of three reports that The Maryland Department of Health tried to deep six. It took us a year to track down what they had done and the reports finally made their way to the legislators. (The story of this event was a chapter in Janice Fiamengo’s excellent book Sons of Feminism: Men Have Their Say.) They really didn’t want this to get out and they succeeded since it was a year late. It was written with the idea of giving legislators a good sense of the bigoted path the domestic violence industry had taken in Maryland. It continues to be a good summary of how the feminists have built a lethal anti-male industry. It is amazing and shocking how little has changed since that time. Sad too.

The attached image was not a part of the original report. lol I couldn’t resist.😀

 

 

Perhaps the most confusing, perplexing, and controversial area in which men’s health needs are overlooked is the issue of male victims of domestic violence. One immediately noticeable trend is the strong tendency to focus solely on female victims and ignore male victims. This tendency is seen repeatedly.  Most media, whether print or electronic, focuses on female victims of domestic violence and all too often fails to mention male victims. Almost every article in the newspaper and every program on TV about domestic violence focuses on female victims.  We see the same focus in academia: courses in sociology and women’s studies repeat the message that women are the primary victims of domestic violence and rarely mention male victims. If you look on the internet at web sites of domestic violence agencies you will likely see a similar bias.1 One oft-quoted statistic is that according to a Department of Justice report, there are 1.5 million women each year in the United States who are victims of domestic violence.  What you don’t see is that the same report also found that there are 834,000 male victims of domestic violence each year in the United States.2  Rather than adding the two and saying 2.3 million Americans suffer from domestic violence each year, all too often the only statistic highlighted is the one about women. One side of the story is told and the other side is ignored, as 834,000 men are omitted. Nationally, we have the “Violence Against Women Act” which boldly excludes men from its name. The National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges (a national group that teaches judges on the issue of domestic violence) offers a typical description which includes women but seems to minimize men: “Domestic violence puts millions of women and their families at risk each year and is one of the single greatest social ills impacting the nation.”3 There is no mention of men who might be at risk.  Most organizations promote the idea that females are the overwhelming majority of victims of domestic violence.  The general public has heard that message for decades and believes it to be the sole truth.  But is it?

The National Council Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) offers a similar message that women are the vast majority of the victims of domestic violence. According to their definition of domestic violence: “There is not a typical woman who will be battered – the risk factor is being born female.”4 If “the” risk factor is being born female, that seems to exclude men from sharing the risk. But a look at their own statistics compiled from state governments tells a very different story. In the state of Maryland, according to NCADV statistics, men comprise 23% of the victims of domestic violence, and women are 23% of the perpetrators.5 Maryland State Police statistics reveal similar estimates, listing men as 25% of all victims of domestic violence.6 These numbers are confirmed and even exceeded when compared with peer-reviewed research. What you find is that men are a sizable portion of the victims of domestic violence, a much larger portion than is usually mentioned through a variety of sources. In fact, peer-reviewed research reveals that most domestic violence is characterized not by one person abusing the other, but by what is termed as “reciprocal” violence: a brawl between two partners.7 The bulk of the research also suggests that women are more often the initiators of the violence.8  This sharp contrast between the commonly-held public view of women as the vast majority of domestic violence victims with men as the sole perpetrators, versus the research and statistics compiled by authoritative sources, paint pictures that are hard to reconcile.

The domestic violence agencies in Maryland are obviously comprised of a compassionate group of people dedicated to fighting a horrible problem.  The Maryland Commission for Men’s Health wholeheartedly agrees with them that domestic violence needs our attention and our resources. The issue that the commission finds worrisome is that it appears that only a part of the problem of domestic violence is being addressed in earnest: the female victims. The other parts are taking a back seat: male victims and female perpetrators. Due to this imbalance, some Marylanders go unserved and left in great pain.

There is a saying among NASA engineers that “an ounce of thrust at takeoff can mean thousands of miles down course.”  The ounce of thrust that has thrown the domestic violence industry off course is the idea of holding men and masculinity solely responsible for the incidence of domestic violence. In its early years as a cause, many of those working in domestic violence assumed that men were the sole cause of domestic violence and, of course, women were seen as the only victims.  It was this contention that has limited their vision to see the complexity of domestic violence and its many victims both male and female, heterosexual and homosexual. Over the years, various organizations and individuals have tried to offer feedback that males are in need of treatment as victims and females are in need of attention as perpetrators, but all too often their voices go noticably unheard.

 

How did things get to this point?

When domestic violence activism first started in the 1970’s, the leaders were mostly feminists who were rightly concerned about the lives and safety of women. What they saw was shocking: situations where muscular men were beating innocent women. Very quickly these stories started making their way to the media. People were shocked and outraged. The activists kept the stories flowing to the media and the media continued to alert the public to the truly awful horror stories. The feminist activists applied their ideological template to the issues of domestic violence. In the 1970’s, the feminist template presumed men were a major cause of women’s problems and were a large inhibiting factor holding women back from a variety of opportunities.  Phrases like “all men are rapists” and “men are pigs” were commonplace.  Men were routinely disdained and blamed.  The horror of males committing domestic violence gave some reason to believe that these early misandrist stereotypes of men might hold some truth.  Uncaring men, using their power to control and beat women, were observed repeatedly in these domestic violence situations, and this led to the assumption that it was men who were the underlying cause of a grievous social problem.  Sadly, we now know that this idea of men being the underlying cause of the problem represents a truth but simply not the whole truth.  What we now know is that although the stories of women being beaten by bullying men were certainly true, they told only part of the story.  Researchers today characterize domestic violence as being 25% men beating women, 25% women beating men and 50% being more of a brawl between the two people.9  The brawling and the violent women had been overshadowed by the more shocking and outrageous examples of helpless women being beaten by bullying men.

This statistical breakdown of 25%-25%-50% is a shock to many and very difficult to believe.   However, we have already seen how the premier national domestic violence organization, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), verifies that in Maryland, for example, men comprise 23% of the victims and females 23% of the perpetrators of domestic violence.  Why would people not believe this to be the case?  Could it be that an ideology that holds men as the primary culprits in incidences of domestic violence continues to inhibit them from seeing situations in which men are victimized by abusive women?

The feminist idea that men are wholly responsible for domestic violence found immediate traction.  The horrible situations that were being reported were all of abusive men terrorizing defenseless women.  This sort of scenario struck a chord in both men and women who heard these reports.  The women were moved due to their own compassion for other women and children who might be vulnerable and in need.  The men were moved since an important part of the man’s biological and social sex role is to provide and protect for women and children.  Seeing women abused by out-of-control men was a very strong call to action for most men.  It is little wonder then that most states quickly developed laws and the beginnings of support for these female victims.  By the 1980s, only a few short years from the early activism of the 1970s, many states had already put domestic violence laws on their books. That’s moving pretty fast, for legislative bodies, who are known for their tendency to be circumspect when introducing whole new classes of penal laws.

What prevented evidence of other forms of domestic violence from coming to the surface? One answer to this question comes from one of the original domestic violence activists, Ellen Pence. Pence was the author of an important book about domestic violence and the influential Duluth Model (discussed below). She was also the founder of the Duluth Domestic Abuse Intervention Project.  Pence admits that there was an effort to avoid issues related to women’s violence and highlights the neglect of female abusers:

In many ways, we turned a blind eye to many women’s use of violence, their drug use and alcoholism, and their often harsh and violent treatment of their own children.10

Why would the original activists “turn a blind eye?”  Did they not see that turning a blind eye put many innocent people in jeopardy?  One of the reasons was surely that the theoretical framework of men being the “only abusers” left no room to see women as anything but victims.  The norm for viewing female abusers came to be that a female abuser was considered to have been “abused in the past” and was acting this way out of hurt and self-defense, not evil or anything else. Their view of domestic violence simply did not allow room for the possibility of the woman as the abuser, plain and simple.  As in all things, if your theoretical framework doesn’t account for a phenomenon to exist, it is much less likely to be recognized.  It is also probably true that the media showed more interest in the stories where women were abused by men.  These stories touched a cultural nerve and therefore sold more papers and air time.  People wanted to read about female victims, but were not so interested in hearing about males who were abused by women. The early activists must have found that they could get the word out much more quickly and more powerfully by focusing on stories about men beating women.

The focus on male batterers and female victims has left us knowing a good deal less about female batterers. How could the less-physically powerful women ever batter or intimidate men?   What we have since found out through research is that violent women make up for their lack of physical strength by using weapons and the tactic of surprise.11  In domestic violence situations, women will often use weapons when men are vulnerable.  Think of Lorena Bobbitt who severed her husband’s penis while he slept or Mary Winkler who shot her husband in the back with a shotgun while he was sleeping, or Clara Harris who ran over her husband with her car as her daughter sat next to her.  All are examples of women committing domestic violence by using the element of surprise paired with lethal weapons. Interestingly, none of these murders or incidents was ever portrayed by the media as domestic violence.  The words “domestic violence” seem to be reserved exclusively for male-on-female violence only.  When women do choose to be violent as in the above examples, muscles simply don’t matter.  A shotgun will beat muscles every time.  The national figures for the United States show that 30% of spousal murders, the most lethal form of domestic violence, are committed by women against their husbands or partners.12

It wasn’t just the domestic violence activists who intentionally ignored women’s violence.  Our culture also tends to look the other way.  For whatever reasons, a woman’s violence is simply not as upsetting to see.  Just watch television shows or movies to see the frequency of women hitting or kicking men. In today’s world it is a given for women to hit men on TV but not the other way around.  Everyone sees this but few seem to get upset or to protest.  We are living with a huge double-standard where a woman’s violence against a man is something we see in cartoons, movies, commercials, or TV as innocuous or even comical. We see plenty of violence from men towards other men but when we see violence from men towards women it is seen as anything but comical or innocuous; it is seen as deadly.  This double-standard likely increases the chances for women’s violence in relationships to be overlooked by the media, the general public and by domestic violence workers.

It is also likely true that once these activists were looking for funding for their endeavors from the government or private institutions, the stories about “vulnerable women in great need of safety” brought much more attention and promises of funding than did a similar story of a man being abused by his wife.  Every politician wanted to be seen as the one helping solve this problem by “making women safe in their own homes”.  Those stories about men as victims simply didn’t have the same traction.  No politician wanted to touch those.  For them, rather than help male victims in their lobbying for funds, the stories of abused men would likely muddy the waters and detract from the powerful images of women-in-need.  The stories about men-in-need were also completely counter to the growing ideology that men were the source of all domestic violence.  An abused man simply didn’t fit into that framework and would likely have decreased the success of any unisex funding efforts.

It is easy to see how the ideology of men as the source of the domestic violence problem likely developed over the initial years of domestic violence activism.  It fit with the image that the media was helping to portray. It fit with the feminist idea that men were “the problem” and it surely helped in advocating for domestic violence funding.  There were good reasons simply to not bring up men-as-victims.

 

The Duluth Model

In the early 1980s an important event transpired in the history of domestic violence prevention.  A group of domestic violence activists met in Duluth, Minnesota after a particularly gruesome murder of a wife by a husband.  The group started to put together what would eventually become the “Duluth Model”, which has since become a staple ideological protocol for most domestic violence agencies in the US.  In some states, its use is mandated.  In many ways it has become the handbook for those working with domestic violence victims and situations.  It is important to understand the initial questions asked by the Duluth gathering at the inception of the Duluth Model theory.  Here are questions asked by those at the initial gathering: “Why is she the target of his violence”  “Why does he think he is entitled to have power?”  “How does the community support his violence?”13  As you can see from the questions, the Duluth Model at its very beginnings was only about male violence towards women.  It was never about mutual violence or a woman’s violence towards a man. It was only about men beating women.  It had no remarks or suggestions for abused men or about female perpetrators.  The flagship theory of the industry only focused on women as victims and men as perpetrators.  Australian author Tom Graves has evaluated the Duluth Model and lists its major problems.  Here are the first three:

1.  It believes that violence is masculine and that men are responsible for violence
2.  It refuses to remark or address the fact that men can be the recipients of violence
3.  It holds only men responsible as change agents.14

These three errors play a huge part in the failure of the Duluth Model to address the needs of male victims and the needs of female perpetrators.  Let’s hypothesize a possible example of the damage that can occur from stereotyping victims of domestic violence:  Imagine both wife and husband have been drinking.  The wife, in a burst of anger, throws a wine bottle at her husband who was hit on the arm as he blocked the bottle.  The wife next comes after him with a wine glass and tries to throw wine in his face.  He blocked that also and in the process, the wine glass breaks and cuts his wife.  The police arrive.  They find a bleeding and crying wife and a husband who claimed that he had been attacked.  Their Duluth Model training has taught them that the vast majority of victims of domestic violence are female and so, what do they do? Arrest the man and put him in jail!  No matter how much the man might try to explain his actions, the police would likely refuse to listen.  In fact, once the wife realizes her husband was going to jail, she would probably start to tell the truth, that she was the attacker.  The police would of course hear none of it and off to jail the man would go.

This man would be placed into a mandatory Duluth Model domestic violence “educational” group.  He would not be allowed to speak the truth of what had happened. When he would try to explain that it was his wife who had attacked him, he would be told to be quiet and focus on his violence. The truth of his being abused would be seen by the group leaders as an “excuse” that keeps him from taking responsibility for his violence.  He would be forced never to mention his wife’s violence.  He would have two choices.  One would be to tell the truth and not “graduate” from the educational sessions, which would leave him legally vulnerable.  The other would be to lie and say he was the abuser.  We could guess that this man would choose to lie simply in order to ”graduate” from the “training”.

This sort of example shows how the system can take on the role of what is being called a “third party” abuser.  The spouse no longer has a need to batter.  The police and community agencies are now taking over that role by treating the falsely-accused man in a manner that lacks respect for him as a human being who has been abused or as a citizen with the right to be presumed innocent or to have his side of a given unwitnessed incident fairly considererd.  This is what can happen when pre-judgments arising from stereotypes are used instead of impartial mindsets coupled with factual analysis.

Since its inception, the Duluth Model has been reworked and made more “gender neutral”, but it continues to fail miserably in its capacity to address the needs of men who are victimized and of women who are violent.

If you visit the Duluth Model web site, you can see that their primary focus on female victims continues to this day.  The Duluth site claims that women account for as many as 97% of the victims of domestic violence.15  We know from both police reports and from peer-reviewed research that this is far from the truth.  It does however show that the Duluth Model continues to be focused on female victims and has failed in taking current thinking and research into account, thus placing male victims at risk and allowing female perpetrators to go unchecked or psychiatrically untreated for their abusiveness.

 

The Duluth Model spreads to the community

As the domestic violence industry grew, the Duluth Model took a greater and greater hold on the theoretical practices of domestic violence agencies.  As it took this greater hold, the ideas of domestic violence being only about men beating women spread farther.  As funding grew for domestic violence agencies, the funding for trainings grew correspondingly.  The 1994 federal Violence Against Women Act started pouring about one billion dollars per year into domestic violence endeavors.  A part of that money was spent on trainings given to the court systems, judges, police, lawyers and domestic violence workers.  The message the workshops broadcast was founded on the Duluth Model ideology that women were the vast majority of domestic violence victims and men were only a tiny minority.  More and more, the ideas of the Duluth Model became the standard.  It was presented as fact that domestic violence is pretty much only about women being abused by men.  That ideology is now set firmly in place.  The early work of the activists has focused exclusively on abused women and now the theoretical framework that guided their work is firmly planted in an ideology that focuses on female victims but ignores the needs of male victims and the actions of female perpetrators.  Now these ideas have been spread successfully into our community agencies and public institutions.

 

Opposing Voices to the Duluth Model — Researchers

Murray Straus, Richard Gelles, and Susan Steinmetz are early researchers on issues of domestic violence.  This group published a book in 1982 that ran counter to the feminist ideology.  The book, Behind Closed Doors,16 said clearly that domestic violence was a two-way street with both men and women responsible as perpetrators and victims.  The response was swift and powerful.  Upon publication, Straus, Gelles and Steinmetz were immediately seen as enemies. Prior to their findings that there is gender symmetry in domestic violence, they had been praised and held in high esteem as instrumental in the early research on domestic violence.  But once they found data that contradicted the feminist belief that men were the only perpetrators and women the only victims, things changed drastically.  At that point, they lost their glow and became villains to those who supported the ideas of women as the only victims of domestic violence.  Death threats and other avenues of intimidation were used to try to silence them.  Murray Straus, Ph.D., describes his struggle with intimidation and explains his own reluctance to publish his results that went counter to the feminist domestic violence ideology:

Researchers who have an ideological commitment to the idea that men are almost always the sole perpetrator often conceal evidence that contradicts this belief. Among researchers not committed to that ideology, many (including me and some of my colleagues) have withheld results showing gender symmetry to avoid becoming victims of the vitriolic denunciations and ostracism. Thus, many researchers have published only the data on male perpetrators or female victims, deliberately omitting the data on female perpetrators and male victims.17

In essence, these researchers were being bullied. In fact, Straus published a paper in 2006 that describes not only the intimidation they suffered but also chronicles the specific ways that the feminist researchers made certain that their own data only produced the desired results that reflected the ideology that women were the primary victims of domestic violence.18

The research by Straus, Gelles, Steinmetz, and many others which clearly shows that men are victims has been available through journal articles for years.19   Some activists have drawn from the statistics and findings and tried to use this information to change the system to encourage existing services to include focus on male victims of domestic violence.  When activists make such attempts, they are usually met with the same results most every time:  the domestic violence industry claims that the peer-reviewed research is inaccurate and cites numbers from their own clinical settings, hospital settings, and emergency rooms.  The numbers they cite are very different from the research numbers and clearly show that domestic violence is indeed primarily a “men beat women” problem.  So who is correct?  The quick answer is BOTH.  The research numbers from scientists such as Strauss, Gelles, and Steinmetz are correct from their perspective and from the populations they studied.  These numbers were usually drawn from the general population and reflect the “average” person or family.

But how about the domestic violence agencies numbers?  Well, they are correct also, but one must note that the sample they draw from is very biased.  They draw from a population that has been utilizing services specifically built for women who were abused.  It is little wonder that they would therefore be more likely to show greater numbers of female victims.  Imagine a hospital that was built specifically for the treatment of caucasian diabetics.  When they look at their own numbers and stats they would assuredly say that the majority of victims of diabetes are white!  Since their services are built to serve whites, that is exactly what their stats will show.  One would also assume that they would be teaching in the community about whites and diabetes and also do Public Service Announcements for whites who might have diabetes.  The same thing happens within the domestic violence industry.  The entire system was originally built for women.  The name of the law the Violence Against Women Act makes that very clear.  It is little wonder that the statistics they compile and the research done within the domestic violence industry on their own populations would reflect that women were the primary victims.  You see this idea filter down to the clinical level where almost every group for domestic violence victims in Maryland is for women only.  The treatment groups are almost always built for male perpetrators and female victims. The overwhelming majority of public service announcements on domestic violence are focused on female victims.  When you solicit for a certain type of victim, it is no surprise that your statistics, trainings and treatment will center around that particular type of client.

 

Opposing Voices to the Duluth Model — Clinicians

While the peer-reviewed research has been noting male victims for years, the clinical side of the equation has now started getting noticed.   In 2007, the American Psychiatric Association published an article in the August issue of Psychiatric News titled: “Men Shouldn’t be Overlooked as Victims of Partner Violence.”20  The article cited some of the research findings about women being more likely then men in relationship to initiate domestic violence and focused on issues of reciprocal interpersonal violence versus nonreciprocal violence. Here is a quote from the article:

Regarding perpetration of violence, more women than men (25 percent versus 11 percent) were responsible. In fact, 71 percent of the instigators in nonreciprocal partner violence were women.

And another:

As for physical injury due to intimate partner violence, it was more likely to occur when the violence was reciprocal than nonreciprocal. And while injury was more likely when violence was perpetrated by men, in relationships with reciprocal violence it was the men who were injured more often (25 percent of the time) than were women (20 percent of the time). “This is important as violence perpetrated by women is often seen as not serious,” Whitaker and his group stressed.

The word is getting out that both men and women are perpetrators and victims of domestic violence.

 

Opposing Voices to the Duluth Model — The Courts

The courts are also starting to take notice of the discrimination that men face in the domestic violence industry.  In the Woods et. al. vs California case in 2008, a Superior Court in Sacramento, ruled that male domestic violence victims had been unconstitutionally denied services.  The court held that state laws violated men’s equal protection rights by excluding male victims from state-funded domestic violence services.  The court found: “domestic violence is a serious problem for both women and men” and that “men experience significant levels of domestic violence as victims.”21  The court also found a percentage of state-funded programs deny men services they are entitled to receive.

Then, in October 2009, a West Virginia judge struck down state rules for regulating domestic violence shelters because they operate “on the premise that only men can be batterers and only women can be victims” and “exclude adult and adolescent males from their statutory right to safety and security free from domestic violence based only on their gender.”22

 

Are there men who fall through the cracks?

We have seen how the domestic violence industry has had a history of blaming men and masculinity for domestic violence. This sort of theoretical assumption has a negative impact on the willingness of men to seek help. The men, not unlike the early female victims of domestic violence in the 1970’s who were very reluctant to seek treatment, are certain that no one cares about their situation and are highly unlikely to seek out services when not invited. What compounds this problem for men is that their gender is blamed for the original problem.

We have learned from Maryland State Police statistics that men comprise about 25% of the victims of domestic violence in Maryland.23 What we don’t know is the percentage of males seeking treatment as victims of domestic violence.  In checking with a number of Maryland Domestic Violence agencies, they often say that the number of male victims is very small.  Some of the treatment centers claim that men are only 4% of their clients.  If the State Police count men as 25% of the 20,000 victims of domestic violence recorded annually in Maryland and the agencies that offer treatment for domestic violence say that men are only 4% of the victims that request treatment, that seems to leave a huge number of men who are untreated victims.  It seems likely that a large percentage of the 5000+ men who are reported by State Police as victims of domestic violence in Maryland are falling through the cracks and not getting the help they need and are entitled to as citizens and residents.

What once started as a righteous cause to help battered women has evolved over the years to be something that seems to help battered women but also seems to neglect the needs of violent women and battered men and ignores the imperatives that the fundamental demands our tradition of justice holds dear.  Both the media and academia seem to focus solely on female victims of domestic violence, with a much smaller focus or none at all on male victims.  Researchers doing peer-reviewed research have consistently found evidence that men and women are both victims of domestic violence, but this finding has not been translated to changing the treatment that men receive in domestic violence agencies. Clinical groups such as the American Psychiatric Association are beginning to alert the public and clinicians that men are indeed a sizable percentage of domestic violence victims.  The courts have also started pointing out the discrimination that is present in many domestic violence agencies that treat men and women differently.
This report is not claiming that men are never served through domestic violence agencies in the state of Maryland.  It is however claiming that Maryland’s domestic violence services have traditionally been created for women only and this has a chilling effect on men’s usage of these facilities.

 

A Proposal For Practical Change

There is a domestic violence group named “Safe For All” that offers trainings nationwide and is particularly aware of the many issues around domestic violence, including those of male victims and of people in homosexual relationships, also an under-recognized and under-served group.   Their web address is http://safe4all.org/24 The National Family Law Legislative Resource Center, www.nfvlrc.org25 represents the nation’s leading authorties, clinicians, and researchers on domestic violence and could also offer trainings and consultations.26

Although calls to Maryland shelters and crisis lines to test for discriminatory handling of reports have at the present time not been conducted, there is no question such testing can be conducted and most likely will be conducted in order to support lawsuits similar to the successful ones used in the legal cases in California and West Virginia cited above. The results of such testing in Maryland would likely mirror these results: In a national poll by Clark University, female researchers studied 302 abused men who sought help. Their key findings were that 63.9% of men who called hotlines were told they only helped women, and 68.7% said the hotlines were not at all helpful. Of those that contacted a local domestic violence (shelter) program, 95.3% said the program gave the impression that they were biased against men, 78.3% said they don’t help male victims, and 63.9% suggested the male caller was the batterer. (See; http://clarku.edu/faculty/dhines/results.htm.27 )

Therefore, in order to avoid costly and time-consuming lawsuits, it behooves the State of Maryland to require all domestic violence service organizations that receive pass-through federal funding or state funding of any type to receive training in non-discriminatory but practical approaches and techniques for handling domestic violence cases and suspected or reported cases. Such training is available via the two organizations referenced above, and also from others.

Whether or not gay and heterosexual men represent a small minority, a large minority, or an equal number of such victims as compared to women in the population is immaterial. The State of Maryland  by its policies and procedures is obligated to encourage and support only those organizations that practice inclusion, diversity and non-discrimination. However, not even very large urban areas can financially support “separate but equal” domestic violence facilities and services for men and women. Not only is it not practical, but such a policy does little to combat discrimination and only encourages conflict over funding resources.  1. The purpose of this training is to provide guidance and directives in how to implement a non-discrimination policy in all service areas.  2. As part of this training program, a compliance coordination methodology shall be developed to assure that the non-discrimination policy is being carried out by agencies who participated in the training. 3. The training will provide cost-effective, implementable, and practical steps that each agency or organization can take to eliminate discrimination and incorporate gender and sexual orientation inclusive policies.

We respectfully request the Office of The Governor to immediately begin the implementation of such a training program.

 

 

REFERENCES

1 One example is the Allstate page <http://www.clicktoempower.org/> linked from the Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence (MNADV) web page that rightly claims that 3 women each day (actually it is closer to 4) die of domestic violence in the United States. They fail to mention that nearly 2 men die each day due to being murdered by their female partner. This is a glaring omission. In 2007 1640 women were murdered by their male intimates and 700 men were murdered by their female partners. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/index.cfm?ty=tp&tid=971 Why are the male victims omitted?

2 “Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings From the National Violence Against Women Survey | National Institute of Justice.” Office of Justice Programs. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/172837.htm>.

3 “Family Violence.” National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges . N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Dec. 2009. <www.ncjfcj.org/content/view/20/94/>.

4 “National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.” National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.ncadv.org/learn/TheProblem.php>.

5 “Domestic Violence Facts: Maryland.” National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Dec. 2009. <www.ncadv.org/files/Maryland.pdf>.

6 “Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence (MNADV).” Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence (MNADV). N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://mnadv.org/DV_Stats/ucr_stats.html>.

7  Whitaker, Daniel. “Differences in Frequency of Violence and Reported Injury Between Relationships With Reciprocal and Nonreciprocal Intimate Partner Violence.” Journal of Public Health 97.May (2007): 941-947. Print.

8  Ibid.

9  Ibid.

10 Pence E. Some thoughts on philosophy. In Shepard M and Pence E (eds.): Coordinating Community Responses to Domestic Violence: Lessons from Duluth and Beyond. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publishers, 1999, p. 30.

11  McNeely, R. L., Cook,  P. W. & Torres, J. B.  (2001).  Is domestic violence a gender issue or a human issue?  Journal of Human Behavior in the Social Environment, 4 (4), 227-251.

12  “Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) – Intimate partner violence.” Bureau of Justice Statistics (BJS) . N.p., n.d. Web. 12 Jan. 2010. <http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/index.cfm?ty=tp&tid=971>.

13 Paymar, Michael, and Ellen Pence. Education Groups for Men Who Batter: The Duluth Model. 1 ed. New York: Springer Publishing Company, 1993. Print.

14 Graves, Tom. Power and Response-ability: the human side of systems. London: Tetradian, 2008. Print.

15 Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs, Home of the Duluth Model.” Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs, Home of the Duluth Model. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.theduluthmodel.org/wheelgallery.php>.

16 Gelles, Richard J., and Murray Straus. Behind Closed Doors: Violence in the American Family. New Ed ed. New Brunswick: Transaction Publishers, 2006. Print.

17 “Processes Explaining the Concealment and Distortion of Evidence on Gender Symetry in Partner Violence.” University of New Hampshire. N.p., n.d. Web.18 Dec. 2009. <pubpages.unh.edu/~mas2/V74-gender-symmetry-with-gramham-Kevan-Method%208-.pdf>.

18 Ibid.

19 “REFERENCES EXAMINING ASSAULTS BY WOMEN ON THEIR SPOUSES OR MALE PARTNERS: AN ANNOTATED BIBLIOGRAPHY.” California State University, Long Beach. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.csulb.edu/~mfiebert/assault.htm>.

20 Arehart-Treichel, Joan. “Men Shouldn’t Be Overlooked as Victims of Partner Violence.” APA Psychiatric News 42.15 (2007): 31-33. Print.

21  “Appeals court decision supports battered men.” San Francisco Bay Area — News, Sports, Business, Entertainment, Classifieds: SFGate. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/10/15/BA3S13HOLS.DTL>.

22 Press, The Associated. “W.Va. domestic-violence program regulations voided  – News – The Charleston Gazette – West Virginia News and Sports.” – – The Charleston Gazette – West Virginia News and Sports. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Dec. 2009. <http://www.wvgazette.com/News/200910080509>.

23 “Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence (MNADV).” Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence (MNADV). N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Dec. 2009. <http://www.mnadv.org/DV_Stats/ucr_stats.html>.

24 “Welcome!.” Stop Abuse for Everyone. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Dec. 2009. <safe4all.org>.

25 Robinson, Michael. “National Family Violence Legislative Resource Center.” National Family Violence Legislative Resource Center. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 Jan. 2010. <http://www.nfvlrc.org/>.

26 Please consult with the Chairman or Vice-Chairman of the Maryland Commission for Men’s Health for more information on these organizations.

27 “Results from Study on Men’s Experiences of Partner Aggression.” Clark University | One of 40 “Colleges that Change Lives”. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 Jan. 2010. <http://clarku.edu/faculty/dhines/results.htm>.

 
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April 02, 2026
Are Family Courts at War with the Constitution?

In this conversation, I sit down with longtime scholar and author Stephen Baskerville to take a hard look at modern family courts, no-fault divorce, paternal rights, and the assumptions behind shared parenting. Stephen argues that what many people take for granted in divorce and custody law may be far more troubling than they realize—not only for fathers and children, but for the rule of law itself. Join us in this challenging and thought-provoking discussion that raises questions most people never hear asked.

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Blame it on the Manosphere

This short video takes a humorous look at the current panic among feminists and the media over what they call the manosphere. In reality, the manosphere is one of the places where their false narratives are being exposed. What we are seeing now is the creation of a straw man—something to blame, distort, and use as a distraction from the truth that is coming to light. More and more people are waking up to the game and beginning to see the hostility and self-interest that have been there all along.

(This video was produced largely with AI. I wrote the script, and the music and images were AI-generated.)

Men are Good!

00:03:05
March 23, 2026
From Description to Smear: The Guide to the Manosphere

Today’s video is a lively and revealing conversation with Jim Nuzzo about the growing panic over what the media and academia call “the manosphere.” Together, we take a close look at a new Australian guide for teachers that claims to help schools deal with so-called misogynistic behavior among boys. What we found was not careful scholarship, balanced concern, or genuine curiosity about boys. What we found was a familiar pattern: boys portrayed as the problem, their questions treated as threats, and their frustrations dismissed before they are even heard.

Jim brings his scientific eye to the discussion, and that makes this exchange especially valuable. We talk about the sudden explosion of academic and media attention on the manosphere, the way fear is being used to drive the narrative, and the striking absence of empathy for boys who feel blamed, dismissed, and alienated. We also explore something the guide never seriously asks: why are boys drawn to these spaces in the first ...

00:48:43

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March 02, 2026
Men Don't Grieve the Way You Think

I had the good fortune to be interviewed by Jason MacKenzie, who runs the Man Down Substack—a publication dedicated to men and their unique paths to healing.

Many of you may not know that I spent many years working directly with men who were grappling with trauma and loss. Through that experience, it became strikingly clear to me that men and women are often treated very differently after a loss. Those early observations opened my eyes to the broader ways men face discrimination, misunderstanding, and hardship in our society. I hope you find the conversation interesting and worthwhile.

https://www.mandown.tools/p/men-dont-grieve-the-way-you-think?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

April 23, 2026
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When Men Fall Behind, We Blame Them

For decades, we’ve been told a simple story: when women fall behind, it’s injustice. When men fall behind, it’s failure.

That may sound exaggerated. But new experimental research suggests it isn’t.

A recent large-scale study involving more than 35,000 Americans found something striking. When participants were presented with a situation in which a worker had fallen behind—earned less, performed worse, or ended up with nothing—people responded differently depending on whether that worker was male or female.

When the low performer was a man, significantly more participants chose to give him nothing. When the low performer was a woman, more participants redistributed support. Even more revealing, participants were more likely to believe that the man had fallen behind because he didn’t try hard enough.

The researchers call this “statistical fairness discrimination.” That is, people infer that disadvantaged men are less deserving because they assume their disadvantage reflects low effort.



The Effort Story

In the study, participants were asked to redistribute earnings between two workers. In some conditions, earnings were based on productivity. In others, earnings were assigned randomly.

Here’s the important part: even when outcomes were random—when effort had nothing to do with it—participants were still more likely to believe that the male who ended up behind had exerted less effort than the female who ended up behind. In other words, even in the absence of evidence, assumptions about effort were not neutral.

In plain language: when men fall behind, people are more likely to assume they did not try hard enough.

That is not data-driven reasoning. It reflects a prior belief. And prior beliefs shape compassion.



The Compassion Gap

The study didn’t just look at small redistribution decisions. It also asked participants about public policy: should the government provide support to people falling behind in education and the labor market?

Support dropped noticeably when the group described as falling behind was male rather than female.

In other words, sympathy is gendered. The willingness to intervene is gendered. The attribution of responsibility is gendered. Importantly, this was not confined to one political or demographic group. The pattern appeared broadly, suggesting that it reflects a shared cultural assumption rather than a narrow ideological position.

When women fall behind, we instinctively look for barriers. When men fall behind, we instinctively look for flaws.



What This Means

This pattern shows up in places many of us already sense it.

When boys fall behind in school, we talk about motivation and behavior. When girls fall behind, we talk about resources and environment. When men leave the workforce, we question work ethic. When women leave the workforce, we look for systemic obstacles. When fathers struggle financially after divorce, we assume irresponsibility. When mothers struggle, we assume hardship.

The study does not use the word gynocentrism, or make the obvious reference to moral typecasting. It stays within the language of behavioral economics and calls the phenomenon “fairness discrimination.” But the mechanism is clear: disadvantage is interpreted through a moral lens—and that lens is not symmetrical.

Women are more readily cast as vulnerable. Men are more readily cast as responsible. And responsibility without context easily becomes blame.



The Quiet Cost

This matters because perception drives policy.

If society believes that male disadvantage is primarily self-inflicted, there will be less urgency to address it. If people assume boys who fall behind simply didn’t try hard enough, we will design fewer interventions. If struggling men are viewed as less deserving, institutions will reflect that belief—often without conscious intent.

No one has to be malicious. All that is required is a background assumption that male failure signals character weakness. Once that belief takes hold, compassion narrows. And when compassion narrows, so does support.



A Hard Question

Here is the uncomfortable question: why are effort assumptions gendered in the first place?

Why do we instinctively read female disadvantage as circumstantial and male disadvantage as dispositional?

The study does not answer that. It simply shows that the pattern exists. But patterns rarely emerge from nowhere. They reflect cultural narratives about men as agents, providers, and actors—people who are expected to overcome adversity. When they do not, disappointment can harden into judgment.

Women, by contrast, are more often framed as relational beings whose setbacks invite protection. Protection invites support.
Men are more often expected to handle adversity on their own. And when they do not, expectation invites scrutiny.



When Men Fall Behind

We are living in a time when boys lag in reading proficiency, when young men withdraw from education, when male labor-force participation declines, and when male suicide rates far exceed those of women.

Yet when men fall behind, the cultural reflex is not alarm. It is evaluation. Did he try hard enough? Did he make better choices? Did he apply himself?

Sometimes those questions are valid. But when they are asked of only one sex, they reveal something deeper than fairness.

They reveal a compassion gap.

And that gap shapes everything—from classrooms to courtrooms to public policy.

When men fall behind, we don’t just measure their outcomes. We measure their worth.

Men Are Good, as are you.




https://academic.oup.com/jeea/article/23/6/2212/8112864
Cappelen, A. W., Falch, R., & Tungodden, B. (2025). Experimental evidence on the acceptance of males falling behind. Journal of the European Economic Association, 23(6), 2212–2240.

 
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April 20, 2026
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How A Culture Turns a Group into "The Problem"
Why the way we talk about men today follows a pattern we’ve seen before


Years ago I read a book called The Death of White Sociology. It explored the rise of a Black sociological viewpoint and challenged the assumptions of what the authors called “White sociology.” What struck me most was not only the book’s critique of how Blacks had been studied and described, but the way it mapped the machinery by which a culture teaches itself to see a group as lesser.

It showed how prejudice does not survive by hatred alone. It survives through a system of reinforcement. Research, media, public opinion, everyday conversation, and institutional assumptions all work together until a distorted view begins to feel like simple common sense. The result is that the targeted group is not merely disliked. It is interpreted through a lens of defect.

As I read it, I kept having the same thought: there is something here that resembles what men face today.

Let me be clear. This is not an argument that men have endured the same history that Blacks endured. They have not. The suffering is not the same. The legal and social conditions are not the same. But the pattern by which a group is culturally misread, judged by hostile assumptions, and portrayed as inherently flawed can look strikingly similar.

That is the comparison worth making.


How a Culture Teaches Itself to See

The book described three powerful channels through which the myth of Black inferiority was spread: common knowledge, the media, and science. Together, they created a self-reinforcing system. Each one echoed the others until the message became nearly impossible to challenge.

Common knowledge is what people “just know” without thinking. In the period the book described, it was simply accepted that Blacks were inferior. That belief did not feel like prejudice to most people. It felt like reality.

Today, something similar operates in a different direction. It is widely assumed that men, as a class, are the problem—emotionally limited, morally suspect, prone to harm. Not some men. Men.

Once that assumption settles in, everything else begins to orbit around it.


The Media: Then and Now

Media plays a powerful role in teaching people how to see.

In earlier decades, Blacks were often portrayed as immature, unintelligent, and incapable of managing life without guidance. Characters like Stepin Fetchit or Amos and Andy reinforced an image of Blacks as confused, dependent, and lacking competence.

Today, it is difficult not to notice a similar pattern applied to men. The modern version is not as overt, but it is just as persistent. Think of characters like Homer Simpson and countless others—men portrayed as childish, incompetent, emotionally clueless, and in need of a woman to guide or correct them.

The message accumulates:
Men are not fully capable. Men need women to straighten them out.

Over time, that message begins to feel normal.


Science and the Framing of Defect

One of the most troubling aspects described in The Death of White Sociology was how research itself could be shaped by cultural assumptions.

In the early to mid-20th century, much psychological and sociological research was not designed to help Blacks. It was designed to explain what was wrong with them. It cataloged deficits. It emphasized pathology. It framed Blacks as needing to change in order to fit the dominant culture.

That pattern is not entirely gone. It has, in many ways, shifted.

Today, a great deal of research on men begins with a similar orientation. It is often less about understanding men and more about diagnosing them. Masculinity is framed as problematic. Male traits are frequently interpreted as risks rather than resources. The focus is not on how to support men, but on how men must change.

And just as importantly, what does not get highlighted matters.

In earlier times, when research produced findings that challenged the narrative of Black inferiority, those findings were often minimized or ignored. They did not fit the story, so they did not spread.

Today, we see a parallel dynamic. When data shows men as victims—whether in areas like domestic violence, educational decline, or mental health—it is often underreported or downplayed. When men do well, it is frequently reframed as evidence of advantage rather than strength. The result is a public picture that remains lopsided.

When only one side of the story is consistently told, it stops feeling like a story. It starts feeling like truth.


Difference Turned Into Deficiency

Another striking pattern from the earlier era was the assumption that Blacks needed proximity to Whites in order to become more “civilized” or mature. The closer one was to White influence, the better one was assumed to be.

That same structure appears today in a different form.

Men are often seen as needing to become more like women in order to be fully healthy or mature. Emotional styles, communication patterns, and ways of processing experience that are more typical of women are treated as the standard. When men do not match those patterns, they are seen as deficient rather than different.

The message, again subtle but persistent, is this:
Men are better when they resemble women.


Perpetrators, Not Victims

Perhaps the most powerful mechanism described in the book was this:

Blacks were defined as the creators of social problems, not the victims of them.

Once that framing takes hold, something important happens. The suffering of the group becomes harder to see. If a group is the problem, then its pain feels less deserving of attention.

That dynamic is deeply relevant today.

Men are routinely framed as the source of social pathology—violence, war, exploitation, dysfunction. And while individual men certainly do harmful things, the broader cultural narrative often treats men as a class as the problem itself.

As a result, male suffering becomes less visible.

Male loneliness.
Male suicide.
Male educational struggles.
Male victimization.

These are real, measurable issues. But they rarely sit at the center of public concern in the same way that other forms of suffering do.

Selective empathy becomes the norm.


The Psychological Cost

When a culture repeatedly tells a group that it is the problem, that message does not remain external. It gets absorbed.

In the years prior to the 1960s, many Black activists faced a heartbreaking reality. Some Blacks had been so worn down by years of judgment and cultural dismissal that their spirits were deeply damaged. The constant message of inferiority had taken its toll.

The civil rights movement did something powerful in response. It did not only change laws. It worked to restore identity and dignity. Phrases like “Black is Beautiful” were not slogans in the shallow sense. They were acts of psychological repair. They challenged a culture-wide narrative and helped rebuild a sense of worth.

 

That kind of shift matters.

Today, we should at least be willing to ask whether something similar is needed for men and boys.

If boys grow up hearing that masculinity is toxic, that men are the problem, that their instincts are suspect, it is not hard to imagine the impact. Shame takes root quietly. Identity becomes confused. Confidence erodes.

At some point, a counter-message becomes necessary—not one that diminishes others, but one that restores balance.

A simple one might be enough to start:

Men are good.


Not the Same History—But a Recognizable Pattern

The point of this comparison is not to collapse different histories into one.

It is to recognize a pattern.

A culture can:

  • create a narrative about a group

  • reinforce it through media, research, and conversation

  • filter all new information through that lens

  • and slowly make that narrative feel like reality

When that happens, the group is no longer seen clearly.

It is seen symbolically—as a problem.

We have seen this before.

The people living through it then often could not see it clearly.
It felt normal.
It felt justified.
It felt like truth.

That may be the most unsettling part.

Because if a culture can do that once, it can do it again.

Not the same history.
Not the same wounds.

But a pattern familiar enough that we would be wise—very wise—to recognize it.

Men Are Good, as are you.


The Death of White Sociology https://amzn.to/4dToojz

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April 13, 2026
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Research: Feminist Hate is Real


I recently read a study titled “Women Who Hate Men: A Comparative Analysis Across Extremist Reddit Communities.” It caught my attention for an obvious reason: it attempts to examine something that is rarely acknowledged in mainstream research—the existence of hostility toward men. That alone makes it worth looking at.

To its credit, the study does arrive at an important conclusion. It finds that gender-based hostility online is not confined to one direction. Both misogynistic and misandric communities show similar patterns of negativity, and in some cases, the levels of expressed “hate” are comparable—or even higher—in feminist spaces. In fact, one of the more striking findings was that the mainstream Feminism subreddit, not the more radical GenderCritical group, showed the highest “hate” levels in the study’s user-level emotional analysis, while the incel group skewed more toward sadness. That’s not a small finding. For years, the dominant narrative has been that hostility flows primarily from men toward women, while negative attitudes toward men are either minimal, reactive, or insignificant. This study quietly challenges that assumption.

But as I read through the paper, I found myself struck by something else. The conclusion may be balanced, but the path getting there is not.



The Framing Is Not Neutral

One of the first things that stood out was how much time the paper spends describing the dangers women face from misogyny. There are detailed references to harassment, violence, abuse of female public figures, and the broader cultural impact of anti-female hostility.

But there is no parallel effort to explore the harms faced by men. There is little discussion of male victimization, little acknowledgment of anti-male stereotypes, and almost no examination of how cultural narratives might shape hostility toward men and boys. So even in a study that claims to look at both sides, the starting point is not neutral. It begins from a familiar position: misogyny is the established problem. Misandry is something newer, something less understood, something that needs to be “added” to the conversation. That framing matters because it subtly positions one form of hostility as primary and the other as secondary.



The “Manosphere” Problem

Another moment gave me pause. The paper describes the “manosphere” as:

“a network of websites and social media groups that promote misogynistic beliefs.”

That’s not a finding. That’s a definition, and definitions matter. If you begin by defining a category as misogynistic, then study that category, you are not really testing whether it is misogynistic. You have already assumed the answer.

Now, to be fair, some spaces within what is often called the “manosphere” are openly hostile. Anyone who has spent time online knows that. But the term itself is broad. It includes a wide range of spaces—some focused on anger, yes, but others focused on fatherhood, men’s mental health, legal concerns, relationships, or simply trying to make sense of a changing world. To define all of that as inherently misogynistic collapses important distinctions. It turns a complex landscape into a single, pre-labeled category, and once that happens, the analysis begins to feel circular.



Reaction or Expression?

As I continued reading, I noticed something more subtle. Feminist spaces in the study are often framed—implicitly—as reacting to misogyny. The idea seems to be that negative attitudes toward men are, at least in part, a response to harm. That may sometimes be true, but it is not something the study actually tests.

Interestingly, the data itself complicates that assumption. When the researchers looked at emotional patterns—particularly expressions of “hate”—the feminist subreddit showed some of the highest levels at the user level. That’s a striking finding, because it suggests that hostility toward men is not always merely reactive. It can be active. It can be sustained. And in some cases, it may be as intense as the hostility it is presumed to respond to. The study reports this, but it does not fully grapple with what it means.



The Problem with Measuring “Hate”

The paper relies heavily on computational tools to measure toxicity and emotion. That’s understandable. Large datasets require some kind of automated analysis. But these tools have limits. They tend to detect what we might call explicit hostility—insults, threats, and dehumanizing language.

What they struggle to capture is something more subtle: generalized suspicion, moral framing, one-sided narratives about harm, and the steady pathologizing of a group. Hatred does not always announce itself clearly, and it does not always use harsh words. Sometimes it sounds like concern. Sometimes it sounds like analysis. Sometimes it even sounds like virtue. And that kind of hostility can be harder to measure—but no less real.



The Charts That Don’t Quite Clarify

I’ll admit something simple as well: the charts didn’t help much. There were clusters of colors, distributions, and visual patterns—but very few clear numbers that would allow a reader to easily compare groups. How much more hate? How much less? It was difficult to say.

The visuals looked scientific, but they didn’t always make the findings clearer. They gave an impression of precision without always delivering clarity.



An Important Step—But Not the Whole Picture

So where does that leave us? I do not think this is a bad study. In some ways, it is an important one. It takes a step that many researchers have been unwilling to take. It acknowledges that hostility toward men exists, that it can be measured, and that it should not be ignored. That matters.

At the same time, the study reflects the broader environment in which it was produced—an environment that still tends to treat men as the default source of harm, and women’s hostility as something more contextual, more explainable, or more justified. Because of that, the analysis feels uneven. The conclusion points toward balance, but the framing leans away from it.

And that, to me, is the most revealing part of all. The study is valuable not only for what it finds, but for what it unintentionally exposes about the culture surrounding the research itself.


The Deeper Issue

In the end, what struck me most is this: we are beginning to see evidence that hostility toward men is real and measurable, but we are still not willing to face it directly—not with the same seriousness, the same clarity, the same moral urgency, or the same willingness to question the stories we have been telling ourselves for decades.

If researchers truly want to understand gendered hostility, they cannot stop with fringe Reddit communities. They need to look at the media, the schools, the therapeutic world, public health messaging, and other major cultural institutions and ask a very simple question: Who is being portrayed as dangerous? Who is being treated as defective? Who is being blamed, pathologized, mocked, feared, or morally downgraded? Men or women?

That would be a far more revealing study. Because the most powerful forms of hatred are not always loud, crude, or obvious, and they are not always found in anonymous online forums. Sometimes they are found in respectable institutions. Sometimes they are taught in classrooms, repeated in headlines, embedded in therapy language, or smuggled into public discourse under the cover of compassion and progress.

And that is precisely what makes them so powerful. When contempt for men is framed as insight, when suspicion of men is framed as wisdom, and when the steady belittling of men is framed as moral sophistication, it becomes very difficult even to name what is happening.

Until we are willing to examine that honestly, we will keep misunderstanding the problem. We will keep measuring only the crudest forms of hate while ignoring the more polished and socially approved forms. We will keep pretending that hostility toward men is mostly reactive, incidental, or harmless, when in many settings it has become normalized.

And when a culture cannot honestly recognize the contempt it directs at half the human race, it does not become more just. It becomes more blind.

Men Are Good, as are you.

Coppolillo, Erica In: Scientific reports, 2025 Apr 22, volume 15, issue 1, page 13952

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-024-81567-9

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