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Domestic Violence Services in Wisconsin - Do they serve men? PART 2
Wisconsin Law Requires Arresting Men Regardless of Who Perpetrated the Violence
February 03, 2025

Part 2 – Wisconsin Law Requires Arresting Men Regardless of Who Perpetrated the Violence

Daniel Carver

Wisconsin State Statute 49.165(2)(f)9.
“Award a grant in each fiscal year to the Wisconsin Coalition Against Domestic Violence toward the cost of a staff person to provide assistance in obtaining legal services to domestic abuse victims.” Since the domestic violence (DV) shelters serve only women, this means that the taxpayers are funding paralegals (often working in the Department of Justice) to assist women through the maze of family court; while the men receive zero legal assistance. This is an amplified ex parte legal system long before the case gets to a judge for adjudication. Guaranteed ex parte in every case, written into the state statutes!

During my divorce proceedings I filed an ex parte request to the judge in hopes of being heard and understood but that did not happen. Ex parte in Wisconsin is only for women. Equitable due process for all? The government is providing free legal assistance only to women while men have the legal deck stacked against them. In my case a government paid official, the (Director of the Child Support Office) literally wrote the legal contract herself and it was no secret that the government was writing it, to favor my ex-wife, and then my legal options were to pay half a year’s salary in legal fees to an attorney to fight for me; or sign this document. This is systemic corruption beyond draconian and is anything but fair or just.

Digging further into Wisconsin statutes, I finally found the law that gets men arrested whether or not they caused or started the domestic violence! I could hardly believe I was reading it, but it’s true.

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (1)(e)
““Predominant aggressor” means the most significant, but not necessarily the first, aggressor in a domestic abuse incident.” [Effectively, this means the larger person that is stronger gets arrested – ie. the man]

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (2)
“Circumstances requiring arrest; presumption against certain arrests.”

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (2)(a)2.c
“The person is the predominant aggressor.”

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (2)(a)2.(am)
“it is generally not appropriate for a law enforcement officer to arrest anyone under par. (a) other than the predominant aggressor.” [Effectively, this means the officer may not arrest the woman because that would be inappropriate since she is a woman!]

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (2m)
The predominate aggressor once arrested may not be released without posting bail or appearing before a judge.

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (3) Law Enforcement Policies (a)
“Each law enforcement agency shall develop, adopt, and implement written policies regarding procedures for domestic abuse incidents. The policies shall include, but not be limited to, the following:” I wrote many sheriff’s offices and police departments asking to see their written policy on domestic abuse incidents. Most refused to give me a copy. A few did and these policies varied widely between jurisdictions. No authority to arrest a citizen and require bail should be under the authority of a local “policy”; especially not when written by the agency that is also enforcing the law! That’s corruption. Checks and balances in the three legs of government? Arrests should be made according to a state or federal law, not some local policy. Moreover, a law should never pass it’s legal authority down to a local policy, and especially a policy written by officials that were never elected ! This is the type of thing you would see in a communist government of totalitarian authority.

But wait, it gets worse in Wisconsin:

Wisconsin statute 968.075 (4) Report Required Where No Arrest “If a law enforcement officer does not make an arrest under this section when the officer has reasonable grounds to believe that a person is committing or has committed domestic abuse and that person’s acts constitute the commission of a crime, the officer shall prepare a written report stating why the person was not arrested. The report shall be sent to the district attorney’s office, in the county where the acts took place, immediately after investigation of the incident has been completed. The district attorney shall review the report to determine whether the person involved in the incident should be charged with the commission of a crime.”

 

Notice that it says “the person” (singular) involved in the incident. The law does not even allow the officer to say that the incident was caused by both partners and that they should both be investigated! The district attorney may only investigate “the person”, which, for all practical purposes….. is the man.

If the reader is questioning these things, I challenge you to ask some retired law enforcement officers to speak off the record about some of their stories when they were required to enforce these draconian laws against men. I have talked to them, and the injustice is well known on a practical level by officers, yet they must go by the law and enforce said law; whether they think it is fair or not. The officer doesn’t write the laws, only enforces them.

So I decided to try to get involved with and attend a meeting of the Governor's Council on Domestic Abuse (driving three hours to the meeting place). I had to ask many times to even get them to email me a meeting notice, then I had to ask often again to get an agenda to those meetings. I attempted to get on their agenda and of course was told no.

You’ll notice on their website, the next meeting date is not published yet. By law in Wisconsin a public meeting must be announced, so this council (90% women) even says on the website they will post a notice 24 hours before the meeting. This seems to be for the purpose of preventing accountability from citizens attending. Why else would they not plan public meetings in advance and publish their time/date/location? Why else would they give only 24 hours notice on a regular basis each month?

They even write out the excuse on their website that meetings can’t be announced in advance due to “unforeseen issues”. These “unforeseen issues”, never described, happen every month like clockwork. So they are not breaking the written law when they announce 24 hours in advance, but they are definitely breaking the intent of the Wisconsin open meetings law. To the Governor's Council on Domestic Abuse, 

 


I offered to volunteer in service as a council member since I was a domestic violence victim.......... you might imagine that their answer was no. I discovered this council had a subcommittee like a task force, on the topic of access to services ! I went to that meeting to point out that my local DV shelter had employed 100% women as victim’s advocates and should also offer services by male DV advocates.

The council’s subcommittee meeting I attended had a prominent speaker, the Director of End Abuse WI. She was there to convince them to issue another 2 million dollar grant so I looked up the grant invitation and it was written such that only large organizations could meet the grant requirements and of course this End Abuse WI organization was large enough to qualify for this grant. The grant proposal invitation itself (Written by who? I have a suspicion) prevents small community based organizations from receiving any of the available dollars.

The entire Governor’s council subverts an open and fair process so they can funnel big money to the feminist shelters that discriminate against men. Many of the shelters offer public classes, paid by tax payers, in how to be a feminist, some avoided that word, others used it boldly in the title of their tax payer funded class that is offered free to the public – women only of course.

To show the full circle of feminist corruption in tax payer money; consider this hallway conversation. This is when the systemic corruption became so clear to me. As I left the meeting of the subcommittee of the Governor’s Council on Domestic Abuse; I stopped the Director of End Abuse Wisconsin in the hallway to tell her I’d learned of the law that required arrest at every incident and how it was really a requirement to arrest the man. She said to me, "No, it doesn't say that.  I know because I wrote it."

 


So what’s really going on is the 35 DV shelters in Wisconsin, non-profits, violate labor laws by hiring only women; and these shelters openly tell you on the phone they don’t accept men. They are seemingly directed covertly under a state wide umbrella organization called End Abuse Wisconsin that is also essentially a taxpayer funded organization; only without financial reporting requirements. I can only imagine what are the annual salary and benefits of the Director of End Abuse Wisconsin.

In her own words, she literally wrote the state statutes. Those statutes require men be arrested at every incident! This systemic corruption network controls and limits access to the Governor’s council meetings (I never saw anyone from the governor’s office attend). It is in those meetings that this council of almost all women, make recommendations to the governor’s office to fund this DV corruption network and arrest the men that have said stop to their abusive wife or girlfriend.

They also, rightfully, arrest the men that are perpetrators of violence against their spouse. But the men that are victims of their wife’s violence get unjustly thrown in jail along with the wife beaters! This is the definition of gender apartheid.

All this is funded by federal money coming from Washington DC, allocated by federal law, the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA). That law, written in 1994, was enacted upon the false myth that domestic violence is always perpetrated by the man. For decades now, the DV experts in the field openly describe the 50/50 nature of DV perpetrated by both men and women (roughly half of the time). Rigorous academic research clearly shows the 50/50 nature. Yet the false myth continues due to gynocentric legislators writing gynocentric laws.

The Governor’s council in Wisconsin is within the executive branch of government. Note that the “domestic abuse incident policies” are written by the Department of Justice that is enforcing said policy – which has the authority of the state law and requires arresting the man. What is happening is that the legislative branch of Wisconsin government requires the man be arrested under whatever “policy” is written by someone whose qualification is that they can use a word processor and were hired by an HR department. There is no approval of said policy, and these documents are not even publicly available on any website ! Imagine a law written that was never given to the public to read ! That’s what’s going on with these policies.

I knew that police officers have a very difficult job and do not get paid near enough for the risk they take in keeping our communities safe. They must be prepared to respond to a myriad of various life threatening scenarios such as bomb threats, active shooters, car chase run aways, chemical spills, heart attacks, child abuse, armed robberies, drug overdoses, car accidents……… the list is endless. Specific training in each situation is very helpful to these officers and they naturally desire more training in every area.  I would want more training too if I had those huge responsibilities for the very lives of the people I served.  

Officers are usually employed by small municipalities that have very small training budgets. So I contacted my local Chief of Police an made him an offer that I expected he would not refuse. Dr. John Hamel is likely the highest qualified person in the country on domestic violence (Editor-in-Chief of the International Journal: Partner Abuse). Dr. Hamel offers online training classes in domestic abuse which are popular with law enforcement departments and social worker offices.

Uniquely, Dr. John Hamal teaches the truth from thousands of academic researchers around the globe. That truth is that domestic violence is just as likely to be initiated by a woman as it is by a man. Just listen to his personal research from the 1990’s on what the wives in divorce courts told him in person: John Hamel, Ph.D., LCSW - Domestic Violence Expert in the CA Court System

Knowing that he taught the truth that dispels the myth of men being the only cause of DV, I offered to pay the tuition for Dr. Hamel’s online class for a local officer who wanted to take that training and get the DV certification. I’d hoped to pay for one of these each year. I expected to have officers rolling dice to see who get’s to take the free online training class in domestic violence.

But the Chief of Police had to first get approval from his boss. Wisconsin’s Deputy Attorney General at the time, a woman, declared that she would not allow her officers to get online training, that she required the training to be in person only; training only by her! She is a lawyer. Officer trainings should be by someone that is or has been an officer, counselor, or social worker.

After this, I was finished trying to change the system. It’s beyond draconian and deeply engrained corruption. I tapped out of this labyrinth of DV services requiring men be arrested no matter what happened. You can’t change an organization, or state laws, from underneath those in charge, especially when they are extremist feminists.

I am copying Wisconsin Senators Ron Johnson and Tammy Baldwin on this letter (anonymously) so that hopefully they will take action. Senator Johnson voted against the reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) in March 2022 The federal VAWA is what funds most all domestic violence
shelters around the nation.

In Part 3, I give some practical ideas for how we can make improvements and get legal equity for all.

Calling for reforms to achieve true justice for all, kids too,

Sincerely, Daniel Carver

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Link to the Feminist pdf that calls for 20 Billion dollars for women’s health!
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https://fiamengofile.substack.com/p/feminism-cannot-be-reformed

Well worth watch it’s good seeing men calling out women’s bull shit when the same women are not use to fair honest responses!

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What If Schools Are Missing the Brightest Boys?



What If Schools Are Missing the Brightest Boys?

We are starting to hear more these days about boys who struggle in school, boys who can’t sit still, or fall behind in reading. This is bringing to light that all too often schools are not built for boys.

But recently I started thinking about the other end of the spectrum. What if schools aren’t just failing some of the boys who struggle? What if they’re also missing some of the brightest boys?

The Variability Hypothesis

Researchers have pointed out for years what they call the greater male variability hypothesis. What this means is that on average, men and women score about the same on measures of intelligence. But males tend to show greater variability and outnumber women at both the low and high ends. This means you will find more boys with significantly low IQ’s but also more boys with very high IQ’s. This tells us that based on this variability hypothesis, boys are likely to outnumber the girls in the upper regions of IQ.

A School Built for the Average Child

That realization led me to another thought. If boys are naturally more variable, then a school system designed for the average child will fail boys at both ends of the spectrum. Think about it. The struggling boy needs something different from the average classroom. So does the exceptionally gifted boy. Yet schools often become increasingly standardized and focused on bringing everyone toward the middle. The children who are furthest from average—whether below or above—are often the ones who receive less. The boys predominate at both ends.

Why Might Boys Gifts be Overlooked?

People who are gifted often do things that may encourage ordinary teachers to overlook them. Things like:

  • become bored with repetitive work

  • finish assignments quickly and then appear inattentive

  • question teachers

  • refuse busywork

  • focus intensely on a narrow interest while neglecting other subjects

Some of these behaviors may not look like giftedness. They may look like inattentiveness, defiance, laziness, or simply a ​s​tudent who isn’t doing what he is supposed to do.

That got me wondering. If some gifted boys are being overlooked because they don’t necessarily look like the ideal gifted student, would we see any sign of that in who actually makes it into gifted programs?

But What about the numbers?

The next thing I did was check current enrollment in gifted programs. To my surprise, recent national data from the NCES show that girls now slightly outnumber boys in gifted and talented programs in the US. That was a bit of a surprise. Not because girls aren’t gifted. I am sure some are. But if there are more boys with high IQ’s, shouldn’t we expect more boys than girls among the exceptionally gifted? Equal numbers would already raise an interesting question. A female majority raises an even bigger one.

What are the actual differences?

One source I read said that an IQ of 130+ was the point that many gifted programs consider starting. But what is the sex ratio of boys and girls at the 130+ level? Since we find that more girls are in the gifted programs than boys we would expect more girls, right?

Here’s what I found:

One estimate is that boys outnumber girls at the 130+ IQ level at a ratio of 15:10. This means that for every 100 students who have a 130 IQ or higher you will likely have about 60 boys and 40 girls. As you go higher in IQ it leans farther towards boys. When you reach the 170+ range there are nearly 6 times as many males as females. Here’s a chart that shows these estimates: (the estimates are from AI and I chose a very conservative estimate from chatgpt to include here. I will include Grok and Google below)

 


You can see that boys predominate at the highest genius levels of IQ. Boys and girls are actually quite similar in the normal ranges of IQ, but the boys predominate at both the highest levels and the lowest while the girls cluster more in the middle. But how many boys and girls are likely to have scores above 130?

If we assume the mean to be 100 and a standard deviation of 15 we would expect that about 2.3% of people will have an IQ of 130 or above. Given that estimate at a typical high school that had 1100 students you would likely find about 25 students with 130+ IQ’s. Given our previous estimate of 15:10 we would expect that group to be 15 boys and 10 girls. Clearly more boys than girls.

It is certainly true that there are more factors in choosing students to participate in gifted programs other than iQ, but IQ is a very solid factor and that factor tells us more boys should be included. It does make us wonder about girls outnumbering boys in today’s gifted programs.

Why fewer boys?

Many gifted programs now consider: classroom grades, teacher recommendations, organization, homework completion, classroom participation, work habits, portfolios, and other indicators of academic success. Those are worthwhile qualities but it seems to me that they are indicators of how adjusted someone is to the school and the schoolwork. This is not necessarily the same thing as exceptional cognitive ability. A brilliant boy who is disorganized, restless, bored, inconsistent, or socially awkward may not look gifted inside a modern classroom. Imagine a teacher seeing these sorts of traits, would the teacher see him as gifted? He may simply look difficult. Or distracted. Or immature. His intelligence can easily become hidden behind his behavior. He will likely appear as a problem, not as a candidate for special treatment.

The Question Worth Asking

I do think there is an important question here. Are gifted and talented programs simply not recognizing gifted boys? Are there gifted boys who never get the opportunity offered by these programs? My experience says yes. I remember watching my own children and their friends when in high school. There were numerous special programs for girls including, camps, trips to the NIH, girl only events, and much more, but nothing even close to that for the boys. I watched and saw highly gifted boys who were overlooked for any such treatment. It seems in our attempts to give girls special treatment the boys have suffered.

Perhaps We’ve Been Looking in the Wrong Direction


For years we’ve focused on boys who struggle. We should continue to do that. But perhaps we’ve overlooked another group of boys who also need our attention. The exceptionally gifted. The unconventional thinkers. The boys whose intelligence doesn’t always arrive wrapped in neat handwriting, completed homework, and model classroom behavior. If greater male variability is real—and decades of research say it is—then boys don’t simply present more problems. They also present more extraordinary potential. The challenge for education is not to make every child average. It is to recognize exceptional need wherever it appears. And that includes the children at the very top.

Perhaps the question isn’t whether boys are underrepresented in gifted programs. Perhaps the better question is this: Are today’s schools identifying giftedness—or simply identifying the students who fit school best?

Men are good.

1. Grok
Safe, conservative approximate male:female ratios (drawing primarily from greater male variance with equal or near-equal means, plus notes on the effect of a small mean difference) are in these ranges:
  • Above 140: roughly 1.5–2.3 : 1 (central/safe figure often cited around 2 : 1)

  • Above 150: roughly 1.7–3.1 : 1 (central around 2.5–3 : 1)

  • Above 160: roughly 2.2–4.5 : 1 (central around 3–4 : 1)

  • Above 170: roughly 3–7+ : 1 (central around 4–6 : 1, with high uncertainty)

    1. Google

      1. IQ 130: Approximately 1.5 : 1 to 2 : 1

      1. IQ 140: Approximately 3 : 1 to 4 : 1

      1. IQ 150: Approximately 5 : 1 to 8 : 1

      1. IQ 160: Approximately 10 : 1 to 15 : 1

      1. IQ 170: Approximately 20 : 1 to 30 : 1 [1, 2, 3, 4, 5]

 
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August 06, 2026
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Maybe It’s Time We Invented a Few Words Too



Maybe It’s Time We Invented a Few Words Too

It is truly remarkable how feminism has been able to create words that bolster their ideology and simultaneously demean men. Some of these have been accepted by the general culture and have even become household terms.

Over the years we‘ve seen mansplaining, manterrupting, bropropriating, himpathy, misogynoir, kyriarchy, toxic masculinity, gender washing, leg hair harassment, and ​many others.

​These words have a double punch. They not only describe a behaviour, they also imply a motivation. For example, mansplaining describes a man who is explaining a phenomenom but it also carries the idea that he is doing this out of sexism, arrogance, or a desire to assert male superiority.

​So these phrases don’t merely describe a beahviour, they shape it.​ And underneath it lies the reality that these phrases are actually relational aggression in a more hidden form. Hurtful words that are easy to deny.

Once a behavior has a ​c​atch phrase ​attached, people begin to notice it everywhere. ​And sometimes it encourages people to agree with the feminist lens of its creator.

So I started wondering...Why ​not create a counterpoint? Perhaps it’s time the rest of us invented a few words of our own. Not because we need more labels​ and not because we revel in using relational aggression. But because satire often reveals something ordinary argument cannot.

Here are a few candidates.


Feministsplaining

 


the act of a ​f​eminist explaining something to a man in a condescending, overconfident, and often inaccurate or oversimplified manner, without regard to h​is own expertise.




EmpathyGapping

 

​The act of offering compassion and empathy to everyone...except when it comes to men.



OvaryActing

 


Finding patriarchy in places where normal people would just call it a bad day.





NarrativeProofing

 

When all the data, even contradictory evidence proves the narrative is sound.




Herpocrisy

 

The remarkable ability to spot bad behavior in men while somehow missing the identical behavior in women.




TheoryWashing

 

When inconvenient facts show up, cover them with enough theory until nobody notices.





Patriarchoscope

 

A precision instrument used to locate patriarchy in any situation. Batteries never included. Confirmation bias always is.

Examples:

  • Boys failing in school? Patriarchy.

  • Men dying younger? Patriarchy.

  • Men committing suicide? Patriarchy.

  • Men working dangerous jobs? Patriarchy.

  • Men drafted into war? Believe it or not... patriarchy.


Of course, these definitions are satirical.

​Well, maybe....

The interesting thing about satire is that it exaggerates just enough to expose a pattern.

If you ​h​ad a chuckle while reading these, ask yourself why. Is it because the​y are ridiculous? Or because they ​are plausible? That may be the larger point.

The words we invent ​are not simply descriptive—they encourage us to interpret reality in particular ways. Maybe that​ is why creating new ​words has become such a powerful part of modern political and academic movements​?

So here’s my challenge. Can you invent a new satirical term?

Leave it in the comments.

Who knows?

If enough people use it, maybe one day some graduate student will cite it in a journal article.

Men Are Good

 
 
 
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August 03, 2026
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Seeing Men Clearly - Excerpt - Gynocentrism 2

Last week I shared the opening chapter of Seeing Men Clearly. This chapter introduces the central concept on which the rest of the book is built. My hope is not to assign blame, but to better understand the hidden forces that shape how we think about boys and men. As always, I welcome your thoughts.

 



What Is Gynocentrism?

The pattern described in the previous chapter has a name: gynocentrism.

The term is unfamiliar to many readers. It is sometimes misunderstood and often assumed to be accusatory.

Properly understood, however, it is neither an accusation nor a criticism.

As used in this book, gynocentrism refers to a cultural tendency to treat female vulnerability as morally primary. It does not mean hatred of men. It does not mean women are favored in all domains. It does not mean women never suffer injustice.

Rather, it describes a reflex—a hierarchy of concern that operates quietly beneath policy debates, media narratives, and social assumptions. When harm occurs, we instinctively ask: “How does this affect women and children?” We are often slower to ask: “How does this affect men?”

That asymmetry is not always conscious. In fact, it rarely is.

Not a Conspiracy—A Reflex

Gynocentrism is not a coordinated plot. It is not an organized agenda. It is not a secret doctrine taught in classrooms. It is a moral reflex that predates modern politics.

Its origins are open to debate. Some argue it reflects evolutionary pressures in which societies that protected reproductive capacity were more likely to survive. Others point to historical realities in which women were more physically vulnerable in violent environments. Still others emphasize psychological empathy biases that lead human beings to respond more strongly to those perceived as vulnerable.

These debates are worth having. But they are not central to this book. The central question is not origin. It is operation. What happens when a reflex becomes institutional default?

From Instinct to Structure

When a bias is widely shared, it begins shaping decisions without requiring coordination. It influences headlines, research questions, funding priorities, policy language, and perceptions of moral urgency. Over time, the reflex becomes structure. And structure often feels neutral. It rarely is.

If female vulnerability is treated as axiomatic, institutions will naturally become skilled at detecting and remedying harms affecting women. Male vulnerability, by contrast, will often require additional explanation before receiving equivalent attention. This does not require malice. It requires only default settings.

The Hierarchy of Urgency

Consider public reactions to harm. When women are victims of violence, the response is often swift and collective. Advocacy groups mobilize. Media attention intensifies. Funding initiatives follow.

When men are victims—even in substantial numbers—the reaction is often more muted. The suffering may be acknowledged, but it is less likely to be framed as a systemic moral emergency. The difference lies not in the worth of individual lives. It lies in the hierarchy of urgency.

Gynocentrism is the cultural gravity that helps create that hierarchy.

Why It Is Difficult to See

The hardest biases to recognize are often those that align with our moral self-image. Most people see themselves as compassionate. We celebrate protection. We admire sacrifice. We view concern for the vulnerable as a virtue.

When a bias appears in the form of kindness, it does not feel like bias. This is one reason gynocentrism often goes unnamed. To question it can feel like questioning compassion itself. But examining a reflex is not the same thing as rejecting it. It is simply asking whether the reflex should remain invisible.

The Question This Book Asks

The purpose of this book is not to argue that women should be protected less. It is to ask what happens when the protection of one group becomes the default moral frame through which all gender issues are viewed.

When that frame becomes embedded within institutions, predictable patterns begin to emerge. Educational practices may assume a single developmental model. Policies may allocate resources asymmetrically. Research may frame male suffering as secondary. Cultural narratives may normalize male disposability. These patterns are not random. They follow from the reflex.

Gynocentrism is not the enemy. Unexamined bias is the problem.

If we are serious about fairness, equality, and moral consistency, we must be willing to examine the hierarchies we have inherited—especially those that feel virtuous. The chapters that follow explore how this reflex operates in modern institutions. Not to inflame. But to illuminate.

 

We've seen how a hidden moral hierarchy can shape the way we respond to suffering. But how does that hierarchy become embedded in schools, research, laws, and public policy? In the next chapter, we'll explore how a cultural reflex gradually becomes an institutional reality.

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