MenAreGood
MenAreGood is a channel for men, boys, fathers, new fathers, grandfathers and women who want to learn about men and masculinity.  Are you tired of the false narrative of toxic masculinity?  Did you know there is a huge amount of research that shows the positive aspects of men, boys and fathers?  That is what we focus on here, being a source of good information and also a place to connect.   Join us!
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August 04, 2023
Excerpt from The Feminist Crusades

This is probably the best summary of the feminist attack on our culture I have ever seen. Have a look and see what you think. It is the Intro to Frank Zepezauer's The Feminist Crusades book and will give you an idea of the book's content. It was written in 2007, long before many had awakened to the evil and one-sided nature of femimism.  Zepezauer refers to the essay by Minogue and if you are interested you can find that original essay here (2001) 

https://newcriterion.com/issues/2001/4/how-civilizations-fall

The intro gives you an idea of how things got started and the damage they have done.  The remainder of the book details each feminist crusade and includes very detailed analysis.   Here's a listing of the crusades he includes:

Chapter 1  The Crusade Against “Sexist” Health Care  
Chapter 2  The Crusade Against Sexist Schooling  
Chapter 3  The Crusade Against Workplace Inequality  
Chapter 4  More Crusades, More Myths, More Bureaucracies  
Chapter 5  The Great Anti-abuse Crusades  
Chapter 6  The Witch Hunt Continues  
Chapter 7  The Crusade Against Sexual Assault  
Chapter 8   The Crusade against Sexual Harassment  
Chapter 9  The Crusade against Wife-Battering  
Chapter 10  The Crusade against Fatherhood  
Chapter 11  So?  
Appendix A  The Feminist Establishment 


It is truly an amazing book. 
 ___________________________
Buy on Amazon https://bit.ly/45bbqWH

Introduction

Referring to radical feminism’s huge success, Kenneth Minogue, a renowned authority on the nature and influence of ideologies, made an astounding declaration. He said that “the radical feminist revolution is nothing less than a destruction of our civilization…We are no longer what we were. The West has collapsed.”[1] 

Feminist radicals, Minogue continued, brought about this catastrophe by managing to impose on society a quasi-religious “fundamentalism.” It rested on the “false and eccentric assumption of male and female isomorphism” and sought to “create a totally androgynous (and manipulatable) world where men and women would become virtually indistinguishable.” At that point men and women would, it was believed, be equally distributed at every level in every field of endeavor both private and public. To help realize this brave new world they persuaded a significant number of educated, middle class women that such a goal represented what women in general desired. As Minogue observed dryly, these women succeeded, “(as they usually do) in getting what they wanted” which was to “replace achievement by quota entitlements.” Because the key to modern Western Civilization “is its openness to talent wherever found, the feminist demand for collective quotas has overturned the basic feature of our civilization.” 

In addition to rallying support from educated women, feminists were able to get what they wanted by maneuvering support from the government which has now become a relentless force “bent on destroying the autonomy of the institutions of civil society.” Consequently, “a network of powerful bureaucracies” emerged that brought “radical doctrines to bear on all areas of government concern.” Among them was the internal affairs of American universities which had previously enjoyed a high level of independence from political influence. However, coercion applied by feminist-friendly government agencies combined with intramural feminist demands often expressed “with almost samurai displays of fearsome aggression,” caused one university administration after another to yield. It was a surrender that betrayed “the trust in the scholarly vocation.” Most severely affected have been the liberal arts faculties which under the quota system–a demand for 50-50 equality–have admitted many women who are “indeed very able” and many “who are not” and “they have prospered by setting up fanciful ideological courses (especially women’s studies) which can “hardly be academic at all.” 

At the conclusion of his essay, Minogue said something equally astounding: that, for the most part, this highly destructive feminist achievement was “accomplished by stealth.” What many of us considered the noisiest and most visible of the 20th Century political movements was primarily a covert operation. Minogue illustrates this point with a concluding anecdote: 

There has been a revolution, then, but a silent one. It has taken place with such stealth, and so gradually, that people have become accustomed to it little by little. I am reminded of the famous Chinese executioner whose ambition it was to be able to cut off a head so that the victim would not realize what had happened. For years he worked on his skill, and one day he cut off a head so perfectly that the victim said: “Well, when are you going to do it?” The executioner gave a beatific smile and said: “Just kindly nod.” 

Such a dramatic essay inevitably provokes questions among the first of which is “How did radical feminists do it?” How could so few do so much to so many? If you gathered the hard core radical militants in one place, they would scarcely fill Yankee Stadium. Yet these few, these unhappy few, this band of sisters, have, in Kenneth Minogue’s opinion, caused the demise of Western Civilization, the cultural home of over a billion men and women most of whom never realized what was happening. If so, how so?  

We therefore confront a mystery whose solution can best be found by reviewing late 20th Century feminism’s tumultuous history. What first comes to notice is the fact that the feminist movement has not been one but many movements. Radical feminism is a totalitarian ideology. It sees a civilization corrupted at its roots by a tenacious evil called the “Patriarchy,” a male dominated system which assigns social duties and status according to gender, and it favors in all cases the male gender. Because this evil contaminates all aspects of society–the government, the church, the justice system, the educational establishment, the media, the kinship system, the moral code, social customs, rules of etiquette, the symbol and language systems, even the construction of the individual consciousness–all must be changed. Thus the feminist revolutionary army divided itself into specialized battalions each of which was commissioned to transform a particular aspect of society.  

These transformationist campaigns were conducted with such high purpose and moral fervor that they merit the name “crusades.” As Minogue indicated, feminist crusaders usually operated behind the scenes conducting intensive but little publicized lobbying campaigns to persuade–or subtly coerce—university or government or media officials to endorse their agenda. Occasionally however some situation arose–a high profile date rape case, for example, or the introduction of female favoring legislation–and feminists shifted their strategy and went public. At that point a particular crusade would flare out into a spectacular media event. Like an artillery barrage preparing for an infantry assault, the now intensified crusade would then lay down a fusillade of alarming statistics and impassioned rhetoric. You would then hear, for example, that “one out of four American women” had been raped as part of a “rape epidemic” which was an ongoing phenomenon in a “rape culture.”  

The connection between some desired legislation–such as reforms in sexual assault law to include “date rape” crimes—and the opening of a media bombardment was noted so often that observers began to see it as a characteristic feminist modus operandi. Christina Hoff Sommers, who in the mid-1990s emerged as one of radical (or gender) feminism’s most astute critics, reduced this M.O. to a simple three-sentence formula: “Do a study. Declare a crisis. Get the politicians worked up.” Christina Sommers could have added a fourth sentence: Establish or expand a bureaucracy. For in most cases the legislation that the “worked up” politicians passed set up a new female friendly government agency or fattened an existing agency.  

Feminism’s role in the exponential growth of government had been noted long before Christina Hoff Sommers and Kenneth Minogue called attention to it. In 1987, Michael Levin wrote in Feminism and Freedom about  the extent to which feminism has achieved its effects through the state, particularly unelected officials of the courts and the regulatory agency, and those elected officials most remote from their constituencies….It is not by accident that feminism has had its major impact through the necessarily coercive machinery of the state rather than through the private decisions of individuals. Although feminism speaks the language of liberation, self-fulfillment, options, and the removal of barriers, these phrases invariably mean their opposites and disguise an agenda at variance with the ideals of a free society…. Feminism is an antidemocratic, if not totalitarian, ideology.[2] 

Feminist agitation for bigger, more intrusive government was not, however, the only element in its transformationist methodology that was noted. In the early 1990s critics began to demonstrate the degree to which most of the numbers fired out in a statistics barrage were grossly exaggerated. Neil Gilbert, Professor of Social Work at the University of California, Berkeley pointed out that there was a “staggering difference” between feminist figures on rape–such as the one-out-of-every-four women raped number–and official government figures which placed the number at one out of every thousand. Professor Gilbert disclosed this grotesque discrepancy in a Public Interest article with a revealing title, “The phantom epidemic of sexual assault.” [3] With this exposure Professor Gilbert established himself as a pioneer in what would become a literary sub-genre, the debunking of feminist “advocacy numbers.” The term once had a neutral connotation referring to presumably accurate statistics distributed to advance a worthwhile cause such as eliminating poliomyelitis or feeding Third World children. With feminist usage, however, the term came to mean cooked numbers used to advance a partisan socio-political agenda. Advocacy numbers in this sense were either wildly inaccurate–one in four women raped instead of one in a thousand–or cynically decontextualized when, for example, feminists made much of the fact that girls attempted suicide more often than boys but neglected to report that boys more often succeeded in killing themselves, five times more often.  

Since feminists employed bogus advocacy numbers in nearly all their crusades, and since these numbers and the accompanying histrionic rhetoric were seldom vetted by an ever co-operative media, radicals were able to permeate our culture with an elaborate mythology which settled like a thick smoke screen between our media shaped perceptions and the reality of our public and private life. In short, the answer to the question Kenneth Minogue raised about how so few could hurt so many could be reduced to two words. They lied.  

But why and how? What was there about radical feminist ideology that encouraged so many intelligent, well educated women to employ mendacity and deception to advance their cause? Most of their advocacy numbers were extracted from “advocacy research” conducted in the academy which as far back as 1970 had become a feminist power base. What does this tell us about the radical feminist approach to science and scholarship and what does this tell us about the ideology that governed that approach? Feminists got things wrong so often and so badly that questions inevitably arose concerning their ideologized “consciousness” which, they often boasted, had been suitably “raised.” And once questions were raised about an ideology presumed to explain all of reality, further questions immediately followed, whether for example such a comprehensive ideology was in fact a religion. If so, had radicals and their liberal allies succeeded in driving traditional religion out of the public square while covertly admitting in its place a quasi-religious ideology?  

Such questions press forward when you view the proliferating consequences of the feminist crusades which suggests that the best way to find answers is to take a closer look at the crusades themselves: how they started, how they were conducted, how they added to feminist bureaucratic power, and how they helped feminists vandalize our culture.  
_______ 
Endnotes: 
1. Kenneth Minogue, “How Civilizations Fall,” The New Criterion. April, 2001. 
2. Michael Levin, Feminism and Freedom (Brunswick, NJ: 1987) p.2  
3. Neil Gilbert, “The phantom epidemic of sexual assault” The Public Interest, Spring, 1991, p. 54 to 65. g --

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September 03, 2026
False Allegations - What the Numbers Don't Tell Us

We are getting a head start on International Falsely Accused day on Sept 9th!

How many false allegations of sexual abuse are there? We are often told they are extremely rare—perhaps only one to three percent. But those numbers depend on an extraordinarily narrow definition of what qualifies as a false allegation. They usually count only allegations proven to have been deliberately fabricated. Mistaken identity, contaminated memories, misunderstandings, suggestive interviewing, unsupported accusations and even recanted allegations may not be included.

In this conversation, Janice Fiamengo and I speak with Dr. Felicity Goodyear Smith, a physician, forensic medical examiner and professor at the University of Auckland who has studied wrongful allegations for more than three decades. Felicity explains the many different ways an innocent person can be accused, separating deliberate fabrications from allegations that are sincerely believed but untrue.

We also examine how “believe the victim” has ...

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July 15, 2026
The Women's Health Narrative Meets the DATA

What if one of the most common claims in health policy simply isn’t true?

We’ve all heard the refrain: women are underfunded, under-researched, and left behind by the medical establishment. It’s repeated so often that most people never stop to ask for the evidence.

In this roundtable, Jack Kammer, Ed Bartlett, Ed Stephens, Jim Nuzzo, and I compare that narrative with the available data. We examine research funding, clinical trial participation, life expectancy, and the unintended consequences of policies that consistently prioritize one sex while neglecting the other.

This isn’t an argument against women’s health. It’s an argument for evidence, fairness, and a healthier future for everyone.

Link to the Feminist pdf that calls for 20 Billion dollars for women’s health!
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1IKEEZMGXtRNxU4n5K_M1d6k2w-ZP_wVT/view

Jim Nuzzo

The Nuzzo Newsletter on Substack http//jameslnuzzo.Substack.com
X: https://x.com/JamesLNuzzo

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Jacks Substack Men’s ...

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July 11, 2026
Mantoon: A Visit to the Doc

A visit to the Doc.

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August 10, 2026
Feminism Cannot Be Reformed: It Must Be Destroyed Root and Branch

Janice Fiamengo’s new book is out, and this excerpt from the Foreword gives you a pretty good idea of what to expect. Janice goes straight to the heart of feminism and gives ample reasons for its demolition.

This is an important book. I hope you’ll get a copy for yourself—and maybe send one to someone who is even a little bit open to seeing the reality of feminism rather than the equality mask presented by feminists and so much of the media.

https://fiamengofile.substack.com/p/feminism-cannot-be-reformed

Well worth watch it’s good seeing men calling out women’s bull shit when the same women are not use to fair honest responses!

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1JtTnYLC7K/?mibextid=wwXIfr

July 02, 2026
From Shooter to Heroine: The Glorification of Feminist Violence

I recently joined Hannah Spier, Janice Fiamengo, and Jim Nuzzo for a fascinating discussion about one of our culture’s most striking double standards: why violence by women is so often explained, excused, or even celebrated, while violence by men is treated very differently. We examine Valerie Solanas, the attempted murder of Andy Warhol, the SCUM Manifesto, and the film I Shot Andy Warhol, asking what the celebration and romanticizing of Solanas reveals about gynocentrism, empathy, and cultural bias. I think you’ll find it both thought-provoking and eye-opening.

August 31, 2026
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The Femosphere Pipeline
How feminist ideas travel from academia and advocacy into culture, policy and law



All we hear about these days is a dangerous manosphere that is threatening our young men. Actually the manosphere is a fairly small and widely varied group of male-oriented communities that has been billed as a huge threat. All the while there is something much larger and much more dangerous that is surrounding both the manosphere and our culture. It is embedded in all that we do, I call it the Femosphere. This huge complex contains, academia, education, advocacy organizations, legislatures, government agencies, entertainment, the courts and of course, the media all working together to create and maintain a gynocentric narrative that impacts everyone.

This is the mammoth sphere through which feminist and gynocentric ideas are created, validated, circulated and converted into public policy. It is the invisible system that makes feminist claims seem unquestionably true. This goes on day in and day out and is a huge and destructive machine that no one sees. No one identifies it as ideological or biased in any way. It masquerades as the status quo. If there is a sphere that is dangerous, it is surely the femosphere.

Here’s how it works. A new slogan or concept is created in academia or feminist advocacy and then reinforced by both. The feminist advocates promote it. Journalists print it. The public reads it. Educators teach it. The public learns it. Before you know it, government agencies are incorporating it into trainings and reports. Then the legislators push it into policy and law and the courts follow along using the same ideas that prompted the policies and laws. Unprecedented teamwork, and no one sees it.

Take coercive control as a​n example. The term was first used by domestic violence advocates who described abuse as an ongoing pattern of control rather than a series of isolated violent acts. Evan Stark pulled these ideas together into a formal theory of coercive control in his book “Coercive Control: How Men Entrap Women in Personal Life (2007)“. (The title states clearly that this was not a gender-neutral theory: men were the oppressors and women were their victims.) Then the feminist advocates promoted it, journalists spread the word, educators and government agencies taught it, and police and courts were trained to use it. Eventually the legislators turned it into law. Hey Presto! The idea of male dominance and men’s violence becomes the default,

There are plenty of other examples like hegemonic masculinity or intersectionality. These all have different paths through the femosphere pipeline but the end product is the same. The specific ideas about male dominance travel from idea to law or common knowledge. The process is similar, an idea about power and male dominance begins in academia or advocacy, moves through the institutions, and eventually gains real social, political and sometimes legal power.

Here’s the tricky part. Each of these groups starts to quote the other groups as proof to the veracity of the original idea. Journalists cite the academics and advocates cite the journalists. Politicians cite both. Then the researchers come along and “study” the reality that has just been created out of thin air and prove it. Then the public hears from these many sources and voila, what started as a theory becomes an accepted reality. Advocacy becomes fact. The public nods unknowingly in agreement.

The manosphere is open season for criticism, targeting, restrictions, and containment. The femosphere is protected by a gynocentric ban on any criticism or even a negative idea in their direction. To expose who has the power just look for who cannot be criticized. That would clearly be the femosphere, women and feminism. In fact, the manosphere is the first public criticism of the femosphere and the response is predictable: Shame it, blame it, and call it pure misogyny. Don’t argue the ideas, attack personally.

This is what we have had for the last 50 years. A slow gynocentric building of a new reality. And what has been the result? Women have been inflated and men have been equally deflated. Ask just about any woman about the last 50 years and she will tell you it is progress. But has it truly been progress—or has it been a one-way transfer of concern, opportunity, and power to women, without any corresponding transfer of responsibility?

And now it is basically impossible to see.

The next time you hear someone complain about the manosphere, ask them when they will be complaining about the real problem, the femosphere.

Men Are Good.

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August 24, 2026
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Sculpting the Narrative
How researchers can build the desired conclusion into the questions they ask



I recently came across an article with a rather alarming headline:

“Nearly One in Five Australian Men Say Violence Against Feminism Is Legitimate, Study Finds.”

That certainly got my attention. Nearly 20 percent of Australian men think violence against feminism is legitimate? That’s a lot of men. So I decided to look at the study. I’m glad I did.

The research comes from the University of Melbourne and was published in 2024. The researchers surveyed 1,020 Australians about misogyny, racism, and violent extremism. The 19.4 percent figure is real. But when you look at the question that produced it, things start getting interesting.

The men weren’t asked:

“Do you believe violence against feminists is legitimate?”

They weren’t asked:

“Is it acceptable to physically attack feminists?”

They were given this statement:

“Feminism is damaging to our society and should be resisted by force if necessary.”

That is what produced the 19.4 percent. Do you see the problem? There are several things going on in that one sentence. First, it says feminism is damaging to society. That’s one question all by itself. Then it says feminism should be resisted “by force.” What does force mean? Physical violence? Political force? Legal force? Economic force? Civil disobedience? We don’t know. And then come the two little words that really caught my attention:

“if necessary.”

What does that mean? Those words ask the respondent to imagine circumstances in which force might become necessary. Most people believe there are circumstances in which force is justified. Self-defense is an obvious example. Protecting another person is another. Resisting tyranny might be another. But none of that is explored. Instead, agreement with this rather strange question eventually becomes:

“Nearly One in Five Australian Men Say Violence Against Feminism Is Legitimate.”

That’s quite a journey.

​Here’s a screenshot of the questions they used to determine if violent extremism existed and to what degree. Can you find the question(s) that did not have the word violence in any form in them? Can you find the question(s) that concluded by saying “if necessary?” They abbreviate violent extremism with “VE.” Here’s a clue….look at the last question very carefully and then compare.

Where’s Waldo?

 


Can you see how they have sculpted things? Which got the highest scores? The one without the word violence and justified by saying “when necessary.” Then you make claims, even in your own paper, the same one that relied on that questionable question that​:

 

Now they call it anti-feminist violent extremism! No need to ask the question with the word violence in it? Nope.

Then I Looked at the Other Questions

This is where things became even more interesting. The study includes a table with the heading:“Frequency of Respondents Agreeing with Permissibility of Violence Against Women.”

Okay. If we are going to measure whether people think violence against women is permissible, what should we ask? Fortunately, the researchers give us a couple of good examples. One question says:

“A male partner would be entitled to use physical force (pushing, slapping, punching, kicking, choking) if his female partner argues with him, or refuses to obey him.”

That’s pretty clear. No ambiguity there. Do you think a man is entitled to push, slap, punch, kick, or choke his female partner because she argues with him or refuses to obey him? 5.5 percent of the men agreed. Another question asks whether a father or brother is entitled to use physical force or violence against a daughter or sister for bringing dishonor on the family. Again, very clear. 4.5 percent of the men agreed. Those are troubling numbers. I would prefer they were zero. But notice what happens when the researchers ask clear questions about whether violence against women is actually permissible. We get 5.5 percent. We get 4.5 percent. Now look at some of the questions that produced the big numbers.

Is This Really a Question About Violence?

Here’s one:

“Women often make sexual assault accusations as a way of getting back at men.”

48.6 percent of the men agreed. Nearly half! But wait a minute. What does that question have to do with whether violence against women is permissible? A man could believe that false sexual assault accusations are common and at the same time believe that violence against women is absolutely wrong. Whether his belief about false accusations is correct is another question. We can investigate that. But believing something about false accusations does not mean you approve of violence. Here’s another:

“Women going through custody battles often make up or exaggerate claims of domestic violence in order to improve their case.”

51.2 percent of the men agreed. There’s the biggest number on the page. But again, where is the approval of violence? This is a question about whether women sometimes make false or exaggerated claims during custody disputes. You can think that belief is right. You can think it’s wrong. But it still isn’t a question about whether hitting women is okay. Yet there it sits under the heading:

“Permissibility of Violence Against Women.”

How did we get there?

Another Curious Question

Then there is this one:“Sometimes a woman can make a man so angry that he hits her when he didn’t mean to.”

33.5 percent of men agreed. But what exactly are they agreeing with? That hitting her is justified? The question doesn’t say that. It asks whether someone can become so angry that he does something he hadn’t intended to do. Surely there is a difference between explaining how something happened and saying that it was acceptable. Interestingly, 21.7 percent of women agreed with this statement too. Are those women endorsing violence against women? Maybe. But the question doesn’t tell us. That’s the problem.

Look at the Pattern

This is what really struck me. The questions that explicitly ask whether men are entitled to physically assault women produce relatively low numbers: 5.5 percent. 4.5 percent. But questions about false accusations, custody battles, anger, and responsibility produce numbers of: 33 percent. 37 percent. 49 percent. 51 percent. And which numbers do you suppose make the story look more frightening? This is where I started thinking about the phrase sculpting the narrative. You begin with the raw material—the answers people actually gave. Then you decide what those answers mean. A belief that women sometimes make retaliatory sexual assault accusations becomes an attitude about violence against women. A belief that domestic violence allegations may be exaggerated during custody battles becomes an attitude about violence against women. Agreement that feminism should be resisted “by force if necessary” becomes support for violent anti-feminist extremism. And eventually a newspaper headline tells us: Nearly one in five Australian men says violence against feminism is legitimate. But that isn’t what the men were asked.

Why Does This Matter?

Violence against women is a serious subject. That’s exactly why the research needs to be good. If you want to know whether men approve of violence against women, ask them. The researchers clearly knew how to do this. Their own questionnaire proves it. Ask: Is a man entitled to hit a woman under these circumstances? They did. And they got 5.5 percent. Ask: Is a father or brother entitled to use violence against a daughter or sister under these circumstances? They did. And they got 4.5 percent. Those are legitimate findings. But if you ask men whether women make false accusations and then treat their answers as evidence of the permissibility of violence against women, you are measuring something else. And shouldn’t PhD researchers know the difference?

​I am aware that this is tough to believe so here is a screen shot from the research that shows the questions and the responses. Note that their highest responses were the ones that had little to do with violence against women.

 



From Survey Answer to Extremism

There is another step in all of this that bothers me. The study doesn’t stop with attitudes toward women. It connects these attitudes with violent extremism. The researchers report that anti-feminist violent extremism was the most prevalent form of violent extremism they measured. That sounds frightening. But remember the question that helped establish it:

“Feminism is damaging to our society and should be resisted by force if necessary.”

That’s it. Imagine changing the subject: “Racism is damaging to our society and should be resisted by force if necessary.” How many people would agree? Probably quite a few. Would we then conclude that those people support violent extremism? What about: “Nazism is damaging to our society and should be resisted by force if necessary.” Would agreement make you a violent extremist? Suddenly the problem becomes easier to see. The wording matters.

And Then the Media Gets Hold of It

By the time the research reached the media article I first read about this, most of these qualifications had disappeared. “Force if necessary” became violence. Agreement with a complicated hypothetical statement became believing violence is legitimate. An association between attitudes became a radicalization pathway.

​The researcher’s own university offered this headline:

 

​or this one from the Australian

 


​with pictures like this:

 

​Imagine being a new reader of this article. People tend to put their trust in the media and even more trust in “research.” How could they come away from this article with anything but the sense that a surprisingly large number of men are dangerous to women and to feminism? And yet when you go back and look at the actual questions, that isn’t what the research established. That’s how a narrative gets sculpted.​
​​
​The​ original story expanded to teenage boys, Andrew Tate, rape, women being killed, terrorism, and national security. That’s quite a sculpture. And somewhere underneath all of it are the actual survey questions. I don’t know the motives of these researchers, and I don’t need to. I’m interested in something much simpler. Did the questions measure what the researchers say they measured? When I look at this study, I have serious doubts. And perhaps the most revealing evidence comes from the researchers themselves. When they asked men directly whether a male partner was entitled to push, slap, punch, kick or choke a woman because she argued with him or refused to obey him, 94.5 percent did not agree. That seems like an important finding. Funny how that didn’t make the headline.

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August 20, 2026
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The Story Beneath the Surface: A video by Gabbi Wolfe

A while back, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Gabbi Wolfe, a therapist who specializes in male psychology. After our conversation, she read the second edition of The Way Men Heal and recently sent me this video.

I was blown away.

What makes this video so powerful is that Gabbi doesn’t simply tell us how men grieve and heal. She tells us a story.

And it’s a remarkable story—one that draws you in, takes a turn you probably won’t see coming, and, before you quite realize what’s happening, gets under your skin.

Through the life of one man, Gabbi shows us grief expressed not primarily through words, but through action. She shows us healing through challenge and purpose, and the extraordinary power of something very simple: men standing shoulder-to-shoulder with other men.

She also weaves some of my work into the story, including an excerpt from our interview and the metaphor from Swallowed by a Snake.

I think she did a remarkable job. But more importantly, she helps us see something about men that is very easy to miss when we look for grief only in tears and words.

This one stayed with me. I think it may stay with you, too.

I hope you’ll take the time to watch it.

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